The things we leave behind
by The Opal Jade
Summary: Buffy is dead. A new slayer is born. She faces the challenge of staying alive..
1. Default Chapter

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: I don t own any of this. I just play with it a bit. 

Distribution: It would be nice if you would ask for permision. 

NOTE: Please send feedback. Chapter two will come soon.

The things we leave behind

Chapter one by Slaya

She was siting in her room. Didn t know what to do. Where to start. How to name the game that s been played out long before her time. 

God, it came like such a big blow into her mind. 

It s not fair. Not being able to choose what you want to do. Barbaric. To force her into this.

A thing that she has never asked for, never expected. Not from a long distance.

It is best that we start from the begining of the story.

And the begining of the story isn t a few days ago but a lot of years ago. Ten years to be exactly correct. 

Then this girl was only five years old. Her name was and still is Cassie. 

That s short for Cassandra. She got her name from the greek myth of Casandra who had the gift of seeing the future. She saw terrible things that will happened to her country but nobody believed her. And so she went mad.

This was the case with Cassie.

She got sick. Real sick. 

She was only five and so weak. The doctors speculated that maybe she won t make it. 

Maybe she ll bite the big dust. And end up in a scary little grave.

She  had a strong fever that was keeping her awake. 

Halucinating. Not seeing the things that other people were seeing. She saw something more. She saw the world end in a great dissaster. 

The voices told her that. The voices that she could hear so loud that she could hear nogthing more. Just them. She could just cry out and hope to be heard.

But nobody listened to her.

The voices were way too strong.

And it was way too late to stop the process now that it begun.

Cassie survived her illness. But never forgot it and became marked by it forever.

She often wondered about death. What is it like to be dead. Does everthing just stop? Or does it move on. Keep going. Till the date of never and ever. Forever.

She could never put her finger on it but…..in some way she was conected with death. In some strange way. She could feel it. Deep inside. 

She could feel it in her nightmares. 

People with raged dolls and pointy sharp knives. Bold monsters with blackness in their eyes. Nogthing safe about it. Then vampires with sharp and pointy teeth. Wanting to bite her flesh, rip it apart like it would mean the world to them.

It probably would. If they would have been real. 

If they only could be real. Sometimes she wished for that. 

That they be real. Creatures of the night dancing with death every step of the way. 

It was something in them that could make a person mad.

Blood. And death offcourse.

How could you have a vampire without death? 

How could a vampire be alive? Then he wouldn t be a vampire. He would be something else.

Cassie clearly remembers when her first and last boyfriend heard of her admiration towards the undead ones. He tried to impersenate one and really bite her neck. 

He did that.

She slaped him as soon as she could.

The nerves of that guy!

He made a deep wound. What? He thought that it might be hot or that Cassie would spread her legs sooner if he did that?

Idiot.

People don t take her serious. And they try to tell her that everything that she thinks, feels and knows is a lie. 

She doesn t buy it.

Well buhu to all of you, you narow-minded creatures of the bloody light.

Yeah. Cassie is a tough cookie to breake.

That doesn t mean that she can t be broken. Or be in pain.

Just the opposite of it.

She gets hurt all of the time. A lot worse than a lot of other people. It s because she fights everyone and everything and never stops.

Up until now.

This really took her by suprise.

She is something of a chosen one and she needs to stand alone against the vampires and the forces of evil. Caus she is the weapon of good.

Something called «The Watchers Council» is sudenly controling her destiny. 

Tomorow night she has to pack all of her things and escape from home because of hers and her families safety. 

She has to go to the abandoned warehouse near the botanical garden. 

Two people will waight for her there. Her new «Watchers». They weren t really watchers. They were substitute watchers because something wicked happened to the real ones.

And it seemes that all of hell broke loose.

She was so confused. These people that she s never heard of are telling her that she must leave and learn to be a vampire slayer because the last one died. 

Scared. Confused. Mixed on her feelings. 

«This is wrong. This is so completley wrong!»-she screamed in her head-«I can t just go off with some strangers that I don t know. I can t leave my family, my life. I really can t be that much naive. I don t know what they re thinking when they say thoose things but I don t wanna be kidnapped, raped or something like that. I m not a little girl. 

They can t get me to go with them by giving me some candy.»-she thought.

Were vampires her candy then?

The question broke inside of her mind during a quiet moment of peace. 

She showed it right out of her. 

She puts her hand to her head. Pain. It s like she s thinking too much. This is all bothering her so much. It s six o clock. By this time tomorow she should be packed and ready. 

No. That s not gonna happen.

«Not here and not with me.»

She steped into the cold bathroom. She closed the open window. It s gonna be a foggy night. 

She toke her clothes off and steped into the warm shower. 

The water was hot, it was almost burning her skin to the point of serious pain. She needed that. A little bit of big harse pain. Just to take her mind from certain things.

Or just to feel like alive. And breathing. 

She went back to her room, smacked the window open. She felt the cold breeze.

Maybe she gets sick and really die this time. So that a nuder one may come after her. So she would have to deal with this. 

The front doors are unlocking and opening. Somebody steps in. Her mother.

She goes pass Cassies door. She never even said «hy» or something. 

Instead for saying hello to her younger daughter, she went to the room of the older. Blair.

She has bought her a new dress. 

Blair was always a mama s girl.

Cassie felt like she could rip her eyes straight out and watch them bleed on her hand. Without a blink of an eye. She was completley sure. 

Caus Blair was, we re not gonna lie, completley beautiful. Eyes like ripe wicked plums. Brown hair, long, long…

Long legs as well. She looked like a princess, you know what I mean.

Cassie was beautiful as well, but in a different way than Blair. 

She had raven eyes and raven hair. That could have been her nickname. A name that all would dread from. Raven. Nice idea. 

She looked like a witch of somesort. Completley mysterious, strong and so magical.

She was like a drog for eyes torchered by the endless line s of shalow minded emty girls.

She had something in that beautiful head of her s.

Unfortuneatly, we can not say that about Blair.

Yes, she is beautiful. But her life revolves around guys, dresses, make-up and her sodding loose of virginity. She thought that now she s o so «cool».

She was emty inside.

Cassie was full packed up. That s all that needs to be said.

You understand, don t you. 

Yeah, offcourse you do.

So….anyway, Cassie was drinking her tea and reading her book. She always had a book somwhere near her. As if it kept her safe. 

Or sain. From the harsh reality of this bloody egsistance. 

She found a crack into wich she could dissapear. Good for her.

She went to sleep early. 

Well…she was trying to fall to sleep. Blair listened to her Atomic kittens and Sugababes albums. Her mother didn t seem to mind.

She just yelled and yelled. All the way into Cassies ear.

«Don t do that.»

«Do what?»

«Yell at me like that. Jesus, I m fucking fifteen, not two. I m not a moron you know.»

«Watch your language little lady!»

«Why? I don t think that Blair watches her language.»

«Don t drag Blair into this. That s one of your tricks, isn t it?»

«What fucking tricks?»

«Again with the bad language. You know Blair could never let something like that slip out of her mouth. Blair could never be a dirty little liar like you.»

They both came quiet now.

Cassie was slit apart and open by that remark.

Cassies mother was refering to the time that she was sick. When she heard thoose voices from hell saying that the world s gonna end sooner than they all think. They told her that she s gonna die when she ll be twenty.

Cassie was suspicious to the whole world end thing. But about her death…..she was completley sure that it s right around the corner.

Waiting. For her to come.

Her mother left the room with tears in her eyes. She really gets off crying on every chance that she gets. 

But twenty years old. And she s gonna die. So little time. Just five years more.

And she doesn t, she refuses to believe it. That s why she isin t out there in the world right now, trying to see, feel and do everything that she might miss in the end. 

She never told anyone about that. They would never believe her.

She was just seating quietly and waiting for it to come.

In some way you could say that she was ready to die. The tick line between her visions and reality comes to be smaller and smaller. Until some day it all comes together. 

She finnaly falls to sleep. 

Blessed be all you little angels. Sleeping under the star covered sky. Caus that s where we all should be asleep. Not in here. Not here where it s so hot. And so dull.

Casting aside all fears that we may have. And living the life we have fully recognising the important things. 

Not money or a big car, a big house…..

Thoose things don t matter to us.

Then after all of theese thought s, a tower emerges causing Cassie to start losing her mind. 

It was a freaky dream. She could feel her mind sliping away into oblivion.

There were others. Just like her.

And there were monsters and dragons. It was everything, and it felt so bad but so right.

«I have places to be! The time is near! The time is now!»-she almost screamed in her sleep.

There was a tearing from wich they came. Evil came. 

Evilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevil

Scared. No place to go, to hide. Can t run. 

«What should I do now when the time has already came, the key is in place and there is nogthing here to stop her, the blood has been spilled.»

Then a girl, just a girl, just like Cassie climbs on top of the tower. She frees the key.

She turns around and she runs…..jumps…into the tearing. 

She gets stuck in the middle of it. And it causes her pain. 

The light vanishes. And the girl s lifeless body falls to the ground. People around her cry.

It s a sad moment.

But so beautiful. So beautiful. 

She saved the world. No body will ever find out, but she saved the world. 

So wonderful.

So…so….magnificent.

The evil and the bad feelings are gone. 

She made it happen.

«This is what I wanna do.»-Cassie felt that second.

Opened her eyes and woke up, her pillow wet of tears.

Is this what they re asking me to do? 

Sweet.

I ll rather die like that. And not to spend the rest of theese five years that I have like this. 

Living just to be alive, just to eat and shit.

And take up space. 

Sometimes there are risks that we take. Risks that pay off.

She has packed all of her belongins that she could carry or need. 

«If I don t go, and don t become this slayer, chances are that I ll live to see twenty one. 

No biggy. 

We take what we get and give what we still need.»


	2. The wrecked ones

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com 

Note: Please send feedback!

disclaimer: Joss, Mutant Enemy, WB, UPN and the rest of the blessed ppl own this. I m just borowing. Don t sue, okay? 

The only thing here that s mine is the character of Cassie. 

Distribution: Ask for permision (I don t usually say no), I would like to know where the stuff goes.

NOTE: Please send feedback. I love feedback. Chapter three coming soon.

The things we leave behind

By Slaya

Chapter two-The wrecked ones

A storm was coming. She could see it in the corner of her eye.

She could feel it deep in her bones. They were shivering. 

She took a shortcut thru a muddy field. The old abandoned warehouse was her target. Her goal. Just to come there in one single piece. 

To live thru it. 

She succedes. 

The building is tall and dark. It screams fear out of it. Mystery. 

Not a lot of people know that a girl was raped and murdered here two years ago. The police kept it a secret. Cassie knew because of her father, a police officer that told her never to go near that place, not even in daylight. 

«I wonder what would he say if he knew that I m here now in two o clock in the morning. 

I really am a fool. What if something happens to me?

Where will I have to go? What will I have to face?»

She was scared, there was no doubt about that. She keeped the picture of that girl from her dream in her mind.

«I too want to do something like that, something important. To be rememberd. Or not.

I don t wanna be a anybody. I want to be somebody.»

She goes to the front doors. Locked. 

She uses her knoledge picked up from various action movies and kicks them down. Not a biggy. It s dark inside. The shelves are covered in tons of dust.

She can t see it, except when in direct moonlight, but she can smell the stenche. 

It feels like theres no one inside.

Or outside for that matter.

Was this all just a wild goose chase?

Or a test cooming from dear ol daddy?

She hoped not. Caus if it was…..she s in some shity problems.

She can just hear the yelling and the screaming. No. It can t be like that. 

Not now when she s so close. 

And she can bloody smell it. The smell of being someone.

Her blood boiled and she couldn t help herself anymore. She put her bag on the floor quietly. 

Then something in the dark suddenly moves. It looked like a shadow. But it didn t have a body. It didn t make any noise.

It emerges in front of her. She was silent. «Is he it? Is he my watcher?»-she wondered.

The blue eyed creature makes a grin of somesort.

«You are the slayer. The new slayer.»

She didn t know what to answer him. She guessed that she could say yes since she is a slayer.

«Yeah. That s me. Cassie.»-she made a gesture to shake his hand. He didn t even blink.

Just smiled a bit. 

It all just feeled completley wrong. Like this isn t the thing that she sighned up for.

Fear started to overcome her. 

This isn t what she expected. It was different. 

«Sooo, what are you gonna teach me?»-she inoscently asks just to break the silence. She didn t really care about that at this moment. 

«A lot of wicked things. But lesson number one is……………..

Never let your guard down little girl. And always be sure that you know who are you talking to.»-he said as his face morphed into a face of a demon. 

Cassie steped back as he came near.

«Don t worry, I m not gonna kill you, I m just gonna turn you. Sire you. 

Hm. A slayer in our order. Beauticious. 

And yes. It **is** gonna hurt. A lot!»

«Well….goodbye then.»-she responded while starting to run. 

She didn t see anything. Now would be a good time to use her slayer powers, sences, whatever that she had. 

It was a good idea. But she couldn t pull it off.

She didn t know anything about it. 

She couldn t run anymore. She triped and fell.

The vampire jumped on top of her and made a pretty embarasing sound of delight. 

She was trying to find some objects to hit him over the head with. She found a brick. It served it s use. 

But it still hadn t got him to back away and get off of her.

It just got him pissed. He slaped her. 

She felt her neck snap a little bit, the muscles just getting twisted and abruptivly painful. 

Her head hiting the cold concred ground.

Everything was shaking and not falling into place, it was upside down. 

She almost blacked out.

«Keep in place, keep in place, keep in fucking place.»-she was telling to herself. She didn t know what else to say, what else to feel. Or how to live thru this. 

He put his arm around her tiny neck and lifted her up in the air. 

She kicked him but he didn t care much.

She knew she can t die here, now and like this. It just can t be like this. 

Suddenly the creature turns to dust. It covers Cassie as she falls to the floor coffing her lungs out. Someone has offered her a hand while in the other there was a wodden stake. 

She couldn t see him very well but she could manage to see that he s a man with sparkling blue eyes just like the vampire. And almost white blond hair.

She was weak and beaten up. 

She couldn t walk behind him as he turned away and started going quickly.

He didn t hear her moving so he came back.

«You have to learn to watch yourself pet. This isn t a fairytale. There are no dancing bloody fairies. Just the fighting ugly demons.»

She doesn t answer. She just looks at the pile of dust and then glares back at the blond creature.

«You re one of them.»-she calmly states.

«But don t feel reliefed just because I didn t kill you. Learn not to trust no one. Not even the lady I m gonna introduce you to now. She has her dark times. When you can t come near.»

«You were here all the time. You were. Why didn t you help me sooner?»

«Caus a slayer that I m training aint gonna be a sugar bloody sissy. You need to take a bite of the real world. Now come along. 

We have places to go. People to meet.»

She didn t argue. Just followed him. She knew she had to tough it out. This was special on her. She wasn t worried about being too strong and tough to love. She didn t want to love. 

Unlike the former slayer. Buffy Anne Summers.

Yeah, Cassie is going to get thru anything and not say a word. 

She ll ignore the pain, just like now.

She feels like her brain s gonna explode and that she ll fall down.

She just picked up her bag and followed the man that remaind nameless to her into the night.

His name was Spike.

And yes, she got it right.

He was a vampire. And he was in love with the deceased ex slayer Buffy. That s why he sounded so harsh. He wanted to make sure that this one doesn t die.

If he couldn t save Buffy, maybe he could save Cassie.

And yes, he was here all the time. He was the one that toke care for the vamps presence. 

He wanted to see what the girl was made off. He also wanted to let her see what is she getting into. And he wanted to see can she take some minor damage.

Up to this point she s been holding out just fine.

Offcourse he didn t want to tell her that. It wouldn t be good. Her mind would be in the ego department and not into the slaying.

He would be lieing to himself if he would have said that he didn t wanna help her from the second that the vamp came after her. 

But he couldn t let that happen. He and Red will do thins a little bit different than the watchers council is used to do.

But they ll never drog Cassie and let her fight a dangerous vamp without any power or help.

That s the bottom line that s not gonna be crossed. 

Thoose bloody sodding nancy boys.

He looked at her and he saw the same thing that he saw in Buffy: power.

It s all about power.

Maybe there are things that she has and Buffy doesn t. Maybe.

Maybe her strenght is more secluded but well guarded. She keeps her grounds. 

And she s not afraid to get hurt by doing that. 

«She ll turn out just grand.»-Spike was mumbling to himself. 

He turns around.

She was exhausted. She could barely lift that bag of hers. Breathing heavily she was trying to keep up, stumbleing from time to time. 

That was a pretty nasty slap for such a tiny girl. 

She was about the same height as Buffy. Her black eyes weren t shining in the dark. As if she wasn t afraid to accept the darkness inside her, inside every slayer. 

Raven hair. 

But she was so tiny, inoscent and beautiful. 

«What will the slaying issue do to her?»-he was wondering. 

It was so strange to cope with this. She was a vampire slayer but she wasn t Buffy. A slayer that s not Buffy.

How could this be?

Memories ran him over like a big truck and a ten-vagon train just after that. 

Buffy smiling, Buffy talking, slaying, beating the shit out of him, beating Glory s godish ass, saving Dawn and sacrifising herself for the world.

Xander and Anya are taking care of Dawn now. They said it was for the best. He couldn t even do that right. And he promised it to Buffy.

He broke the promise. And hated himself because of that. 

And now he has a second chance!

He s very well not gonna bloody waste it. This slayer stays alive. For a very very long time. Till sodding old age.

There s nogthing he wouldn t do for Cassie. He would sacrifice himself if it would be needed. To make amends.

And to let thoose vivid nightmares go. 

Not to curse him anymore in his sleep with words of hate.

He took the bag from Cassies hand.

«Thanks»-she said.

They keept on walking.

«Where are we going?»-she asks again.

«Not long now. We ll be there soon. 

You re Cassie, right.»

«Yeah.»

«Is that short for Casandra?»

«Yes it is.»

«I knew a sweet girl named Casandra once….»-he abruptly shuts up. Caus if memory serves him right, he killed the Casandra that he knew. But maybe it s better to just be honest up until the full end. It s probably a better aproach.

So when Cassie asked what was that Casandra like, Spike answered that she was tasty. Very hot blood.

She looked  him with a question in her eyes. She eventually spilled it out.

«But….aren t you suposed to be my watcher, a person who teaches me how to kill vampires and a person who should…..um…..not kill people?»

«Good question pet.»

He started to call her pet. didn t even notice. It was natural to him. To be close and personal with the slayer. He keeped on forgeting that Cassie isn t Buffy.

«The truth is that it s better that I teach you how to kill us caus I know the inside story. I know where does it hurts the most. Besides, I couldn t kill humans again even if I wanted to.

I ve got a chip in my head. Don t ask. A long story.

Besides, I m not t gonna be the only one who will train you. There s also Red.»

«Is that her real name?»

«No. Her name is Willow. But she has the red-riding hood thing going on on her hair so I call her Red. She s getting used to it. 

I think it bothers her to be called Willow since Buffy died. They were best friends.»

Cassie tries to recall the people from her dream. One of them, a girl had red hair. Then Buffy must be the last slayer. The one before her.

She felt that she could ask him about it even if he sounded kinda harsh and tough.

«Is Buffy the slayer that died? The one that came after me?»

He looked her in suprise. He didn t know how could she know that.

«Yes, she is. Have you been told about her?»

«No. I had a dream about it.»

«About what?»-Spike got a little nervous. He didn t know what this means. Is there a real piece of Buffy in her? 

«About what happened that time when she jumped of a tower. Into the tearing. I remember Willow…um….I mean Red. I saw how some people surounded her dead body. 

One guy was holding a blond girl in his arms, she was hurt….»

«That would be Xander and Anya.»-he interupts her-«Keep going.»

«It s not very clear. But i think that I may remember you. I think that you re face was bloody and that you cried. Did you cry for her?»

«Yeah pet, yeah I did. 

We re gonna have Red to look into that wicked head of yours.»

«You all loved her yery much, right? I could sence it.»

Spike looks at her.

«More than my bloody undead life. 

Caus you know…..wwe re all a wreck without her.

She was the one that was keeping us all together. Without her………..

We ve just grown apart. We re not the people we once were. 

It s all fucked up now.»

They came to an old sementary.

Spike went into a nearby crypt.

Cassie followed his way.


	3. Meet Red

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: Joss an co own this. Everything, except the character of Cassie wich is a figment from my imagination but it has grounds in the BTVS world created by Joss.

NOTE: Chapter four cooming soon. 

The things we leave behind-chapter three-Meet Red

By Slaya

Cassie followed him thru the damp old doors that were threatening to fall down any time now. 

She was suprised by what she saw. 

The crypt was large and it had rooms under the earth. Candle light was lightening it up. 

She caught a glimpse of a red reflection from somewhere. 

It was Willows hair. Cassie steped up to her.

«You must be Willow.»

Willow lifts her head and sees Cassie. She lightens up a bit. Her heart gets all mushy and squisy.

This was a new slayer in front of her. A slayer that she ll get to protect and train. Along with Spike. An this one s gonna live a long, long time. 

She was sure of it. 

It can t happen again. She can t  die. 

«You can call me Red.»-she says smiling at her. 

Cassie felt kinda reliefed because of the smile. She felt like she was in good loving caring hands. Willow reminded her on warm things, momies kisses and hugs.

She wasn t afraid anymore.

«Why don t you tell her about the dream?»-Spike said.

«What dream?»

«My dream about the last slayer. He said that her name was Buffy.»

«Yes.»-Red replied with a tear in her eye-«Yes. Her name was Buffy.

What was the dream about?»

«She jumped of a big tower and saved the world. Again. I felt it like it wasn t the first time she has done that. And I saw you, him and some other people.»

«That s completley natural, to have dreams like that. You are a gifted slayer.»

Silence.

«What can you tell me about her?»

«A whole lot.»-Spiek replied-«Red, do you know that she kissed me that time when Glory thought that I was the key. She was acting like the Buffybot. And she kissed me.»

«Spike don t let it take over again.»-Willow said-«You re a wreck.»

«You re bloody right. And I ll be damned if Cassie ends up like her.»-he said storming out of the room, out of the crypt, into the night with no visible reason to get that upset. He was blowing up on every little thing without a warning.

Cassie now felt uncomfortable, like she was doomed to live in this girl s shadow caus these people had strong atachments to her. 

«Sit down Cassie. Don t worry about this. He was in love with her. It s natural that he freaks out sometimes. But believe me, he ll be there when you ll need him.

You can count on him. Okay?»

«Okay.»

«If you want I can tell you about Buffy.»

«Well I just want to know how to be a slayer and how to stay alive. And yes, I wanna hear about her.»

«Well she wasn t an ordinary slayer. She was called when she was fifteen just like you and she had no previous training just like you. 

She killed a lot of vampires in her time. Got biten a few times, actually two times, stoped the world end atleast seven times. I lost track.

Defeated a hellbitch hellgod from hell. Sacrifised all that she had. 

Love, life and even her death. It coudn t be a normal death in her old days. It had to be then and there.»

«I saw it.»-Cassie whispered-«She was so beautiful.»

«Yeah I know.

The strangest thing is that I can see pieces of her in you.

You must be tired. You had to fight a vamp, right?»

«Aha.»

«Sorry about that but we had to it. 

Training begins tomorow morning after we leave town.»

«Leave town?»

«Yes…. 

Go. 

Go and sleep.»-she shows her a bed in the corner.

Cassie goes quietly. 

Her tears melting on the pillow.

Willow turns out the candles with one movement of a finger. Cassie missed that. 

No biggy.

Red s gonna take good care for her magicians capability. Pretty soon, she ll be able to do that.

She steped out. Locked the door. And went on searching for Spike.

She found him lieing on the ground. Helpless and confused.

He senced her.

«What now Red?»-he asked.

«You re making a big mistake.»

He just looked at her with eyes wide open.

«How could you let a vamp on her? She doesn t even understand what it means to be a slayer! What are you trying to do? Kill her!»-she went all out on the anger.

«Offcourse bloody not. I m trying to keep her alive.

Look, you just take care for the spells, and teaching her how to do them or whatever, I ll take care of the rest.»

«That wasn t the deal. 

We both need to take care of her.»

«And that s excatly what we re gonna do.»

They toke a brake for a moment. 

«I m sorry Red. But I don t wanna see that dear girl killed.»-Spike apologized.

«I don t want that either.

And please don t act so emotional when she asks about Buffy.  You look weak then. You are. And I am also…..when it comes to Buffy. But we have to bare in mind that we need to be strong for Cassie now and let her think that we re strong, stronger than we really are.»

«That s a good point there Red.»

«I m gonna take her to Sunnydale tomorow morning. When are you cooming?»

«I ll be off as soon as night falls.»

«Good. You re gonna give her her first lesson.»

«Me?!?»

«Yes you.»

«Why?»

«Because I said so. I have a plan.»-she wickedly smiled for the first time since Buffy died and Tara went away with Xander, Anya and Dawn, far away from Sunnyhell.

She turns around. Goes back to the crypt. 

«This is really gonna be a wild ride», she thought to herself, «I won t be okay with everything that Spike does. But in the end it really should be okay. I think that Cassie has it better with us as her watchers. A vampire and a witch.

It gives her better chances.»

«Did Buffy had thoose chances?»-a unknown question apears out of nowhere making Willow to force herself not to cry or fall down.

She needs to be strong now. For Cassie. 

**************************************************************************

Cassie was in the crypt. Sleeping. 

She had another dream. And the voices of the past came back with a loud sound of horror.

She saw dark, almost black blood on her hand. 

She saw Buffy with the first slayer in front of her. 

«Death is your gift.»-she was saying.

«Death is my what?»-Buffy replied. 

«Is death my gift also?»-Cassie interupted.

Buffy turned and looked at her. «So, you re the one that came after me. You look like you can handle it. Yeah. You ll be just fine.»

The first slayer said nogthing. 

«Take care of Willow and Spike for me. I know they both are a wreck now. But I m okay. And they have to be okay. Caus you have to be okay.»

Cassie circles around the fire to the first slayer. Buffy looked at them. 

She was there one second. And gone the next. 

«What does this mean?»-Cassie asked the first slayer showing her her hands covered with black blood.

The slayer wiped them clean.

«You don t wanna know what it means.»

«Yes I do. Tell me.»

«It means that you have to watch your back caus if you don t, your hands will be covered in blood. And you ll like it.

Death isn t your gift. Death is your friend.»

With these words in mind Cassie snaped out of it. She woke up. She was in a moving car. And the sun was in the sky way up high.

Red was driving.

«Where are we going?»

«Home. To your new home.»  

«And where exactly is that?»

«Dear ol Sunnyhell, California.»

«And what when we get there?»

«We stop some major evil. And do some major evil. Um….just to the evil ones. Not to, you know….good guys. An.. .an. ..and we re gonna have some fun»-she blinks at Cassie-«We ll manage, don t worry. Everything s gonna be just fine.»


	4. Vivid

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: Everything here ( the characters, town of Sunnydale…etc…etc..)   is owned by Joss Whedon, WB, UPN, Mutant Enemy and the rest of them………

Everything except the character of Cassie who is a figment of my imagination but based on the grounds of the BTVS world that Joss created.

Distribution: ASK ASK ASK! 

Just e-mail me.

NOTE: I love reviews. Send feedback, don t be shy. Chapter  five cooming soon.

The things we leave behind

Vivid

Chapter four by Slaya

«This is strange. I think that I won t miss my family at all. Were those conections with them always o so loose?»

Cassie thought while entering the living room that used to be ocupaded by one called Rupert Giles. But he s in England now.

Buffy s watcher. Can anyone imagine the guilt on his back?

Willow opened the closed windows, steped up to a old bookcase and grabed one. It was very old. It was called «Vampyre». 

She gave it to Cassie.

«Here, get cleaned up, eat something and read this, okay?»

Cassie looks down on the book. The name terifies her. It was saying that this is all gonna be a very real thing. Not a dream. Maybe a nightmare, one of thoose that you enjoy having.

A vivid touch in the sea of dark. 

Yes. This slaying thing will really touch her deep.

She takes the book.

«Am I gonna read a lot of these kind of books?»

«Yes, you ll need to know a lot about vampires, demons, alternate dimensions, magic and everything. It s for your own good.»-Red says.

«Okay. I don t have a problem with it.»-she stops before she asks the other question-«So….what s the other part of my training?»

«Fighting. And doing spells.»

«Spells?»

«I m a wicca.»-Red replied like it wasn t anything, she said it just like someone would say that they bought a hat or something. 

This came as a blow to Cassie, but not that much. She already knew that Spike was a vampire so it would be natural to assume that Willow would have some special powers. 

Or stuff like that.

«So what are you gonna teach me?»-she asked as Red started to unpack her and Cassies things upstairs.

«I m gonna teach you how everything in the world is connected. How everything in the world is love. Well…not exactly love but….on a pretty good way to it.

Only then I can teach you how to practice witcraft. You could use spells while you slay. It could save your life. Save the world.

You know.»

«And Spike is gonna teach me how to fight?»

«Aha. You couldn t be better off, trust me.»-she said while trying to move the closet to the other side of the room.-«Spike knows where it hurts the most for their kind.»

«Why is he doing it? Why does he help me? I m a slayer. He s a vampire.»

«That s a good question. Save it for later. Ask him that.»

«Okay. Do you need any help?»

«No I m fine.»

«Why don t you use your magic or somerthing?»

«It shouldn t be used for things like this. It could, but I don t like that. You become to lazy. Trying to do everything with the help of the craft. And then it just stops being witcraft. 

It turns to something else. 

Something we can t recognise.»-she was saying as if she d been there. Done that crazy shit.

Cassie just left her and went into the kitchen. Got something to eat. 

Started reading the book.

After she finished she was a big pot of vampire knowledge. 

Red even questioned her, like she was in school. Then it hit her. School. She went to scool back in her town, but…..will they let her go here to school?

«Red.»

«Yeah sweetie?»

«Will I go here to school?»

Willow looked a little  worried or maybe sad. Not the first two weks. We need to concetrate on your training. Okay? 

But after that…hey! Tumbs up!»

Cassie felt reliefed. 

She had dinner and Red threated her just like a child of her own. It was…..warm. 

Cookies, mommie hugs, fairy tales, squishy blue stuffed bears, Celine Dion s asshool songs. 

Soon night has fallen. 

«Dress warmly but be sure that you ll be able to fight. We re going out patroling. Okay?»

«But….shouldn t Spike teach me that? Fighting I mean.»

«Yeah, that was the plan but it s better that you get familrised with Sunnydale the sooner the better. Besides, I m gonna show you how to use spells wile slaying, the places to patrol, all the back alleys and after we re done, we can go to the local club, The Bronze. Or maybe we could start there, vampires like to pick up people there. 

It s gonna be fun.»-she throws a stake in Cassies hand.

«Don t worry. I ll help you more than Spike did.» 

Cassie trusted her. 

Felt tingles. Felt like a kill is cooming on soon. 

«Just act like a ordinary girl. Sometimes they come to you not knowing who you are.»-Red didn t stop giving out advices. 

«As a slayer you have capabilities that other people don t have. You could kill a vampire just with that. Just don t panic. 

Remember…you re the….the……monkey and he s or she s a banana.

You eat them for breakfeast. 

That s a bad analogy. Would you like it better if you would be the black panther and the vampires like….*not*.»

Cassie laughed.

«Yeah, that would be better.»

«And never let your guard down. Try to sence them. You can do it.»

She was so happy. Training a slayer. Telling her what happend to her and the gang. 

A slayer that lives. 

She forgot all about Buffy s death for the moment, about Dawn leaving with Xander, Anya… and Tara. 

She didn t think about it. 

But then they walked to a grave. 

                                   «Buffy Anne Summers

                                            1981-2001

                                         Beloved friend

                                         Devoted sister

                                     She saved the world.

                                              A lot.»

«Is this her grave?»

«Yeah, this is her grave.»

«It s pretty.»


	5. The body of

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: I don t own BTVS, this isn t writen for profit. Just for fun.

The only thing thats mine here is the character of Cassie.

NOTE: Chapter six cooming soon. 

Distribution: E-mail me and ask.

The things we leave behind

Chapter five-The body of….

By Slaya

«Yeah, it is pretty.»

She was remembering how they all stod there in front of it. All of them together. 

They put white flowers on the green grass that looked so peaceful….

And yet, some strange demon was haunting their soles.

Filled them up with tears of fear.

For her.

What is it like out there for her?

Is she warm? 

Is she safe?

Does she know that Dawn s okay?

That we all are….more or less. If someone could ever call us okay.

She got into the memory so much that she failed to realize the vamps, about ten feet from her and Cassie. They were all around the three young girls and they didn t mind anybody else that was watching.

Cassie looked at Red. She didn t know what to do. 

To save the girls? 

«But am I gonna get out of it alive and well?»

Or to do something else?

Her body and her brain got into a wild argue about that question.

The brain wanted to run away from this as far as possible.

It senced grave danger.

But her body….

That s a different story.

The body wanted to get there and stake them. Her eyes were glaring and she was more and more compelled to save the girls. 

Willow just said, «Go on. You can do it. I ll watch your back.»

Cassie didn t see Willow ever doing a spell or something like that. She didn t know how powerful or weak she was. But it didn t matter.

She trusted her. She trusted the look in her eyes while watching the ex slayer s grave.

She put the stake in her arm. 

«It feel s weird. To willingly enjoy this. Caus….it s a…..kill. A kill.»-she managed to say in her mind before the vamps spotted her and put on a good fight, a fight that Cassie couldn t follow very fast. Or very well for that matter.

But there was Red. To watch her back.

While the vamps surrounded her, Red put her hand towards one of them and quiet but harsh whispered, «Ignis.»

He burned to the dust. 

While the others turned around, Cassie had caught her chance well and put the stake in the nearest one to her. It took her a while to stab it deep enough, but a forcefield was protecting her and Red so there were no timely limitations.

He turned to dust. 

This has been a new one to Cassie.

The smell of the rotten corpse floating around in the air. It came into her lungs so deep that she couldn t resist from coughing her insides out. 

Red took care for the two vamps that remained.

It all came to an end.

Brief pictures of runing toward the danger instead of runing from it were locked in Cassies memory forever. She turned around. Red smiled at her.

Thoose three girls that they saved…they were…..in one piece.

She saved them. Not alone, but she had a part in it. 

She was officially a _hero_. 

A hero.

The girls were gone by now. As they should be in a dark town like Sunnyhell. 

«What do you think?»

«I think that I couldn t set one of them on fire even if I had a torch in my hand.», she said gasping for air. Red smiles.

«You do understand that Spike would left you all alone to fight them till your nuckles and everything else got cracked and swollen?»

«Yeah. He looks like that kind of a type.»

«That s why I choose to take you patrolling before he does. You godda get used to a little bit of roughness in your trainings. It can t hurt. Well….yes it can, but it helps. To get hit on the head sometimes. Makes us watch our backs a little better.»

«Yeah.»

A vampiric shadow walked out of the dark and stepped up to them. 

Cassie twiches, sencing him before she could see or hear him.

«Gossepin a bit bout me pets?»-his dark voice made a mark on the night where nogthing could be heard but Willow and Cassies voice. After the fight was over, there was only silence that remained.

«Good sencing duck.», he refered to Cassie, «There ll be a good one from you after all.»


	6. A good one

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: The same as in the previous chapters.

NOTE: Love to write it. Hope you like it as much.

The things we leave behind

Chapter six-A good one 

By Slaya

«She s really got the toughness in her. And just after a few weeks of training.»-Spike was talking to himself. A glitter in his eye. 

Not a tear, not by any chance. 

Just a happy little glitter. 

Caus Cassie was here to stay.

He was enjoying his coup a blood while sitting in his chair at his crypt watching a late night rerun of «Passions». 

«That old bloody witch person.»-he grined to himself-«Why doesn t she leave the poor Timmy bloke alone?»

his shirt was full of vampire dust.

Cassie was really geting better and better. 

It started off kinda slow, but she grew strong. And learned how to do spells, the little ones.

Red is her guide for that mather.

For the staking and the fighting there s Spikey-boy. 

Tonight she really took him by suprise. She staked four vamps on her own. And not just that. It s something in that drive that she has. 

The drive to kill or be killed.

The drive to walk along the edge all the time, taking chances but never falling down. 

His doors open.  Leaving no one behind. Just another shadow.

Everyone here were walking in shadows.

They ve grown coustume to it. Just to keep their blood inside the body and not outside.

«Hey Red.»-Spike said without turning around. 

«Wow. Really godda work on my sneakin up tacticks.»

«Na, it s just fine. The perfume is what got me on the «witch entering my crypt» thing.»

«Ah.»-she sounded like suprised but really she was kinda down for the perfume that she missed in thinking about how could she sneak up on Spike.

It wasn t anything important, but she wanted to know how to do that. The sneaking up thing.

«So….how did she do tonight?»

«Bloody well fine.»-Spike replied with a strange glare while turning off the tube-«She s been holding her ground, didn t need an didn t ask for help. 

It s pretty safe to let her of her leash for awhile.

Not too much….but try not to make her read all thoose books.»

Willow looked kinda outraged.

«Not to read books! Thoose books are saving her life for the godesses sake!»

«I didn t mean it like that. Now don t get me wrong duck…»

«O I got you quite right.»

«Look…..»-he stoped to take a deep breath-«Sorry Red.

Where is she now.»

«I left her at home in bed. But she sneaked out, wanted to slay some more.

I pretended not to notice it.»

«What if anything goes a little bit wrong.»

«It won t. I casted a spell.»

«Fine then duck. You shouldn t use magic for all of your problems, you re giving the little slayer niblet a wrong example.»

«Yeah, I know.»

«God, really need some action, need some action, really need action.»-she was mumbleing while shaking from the cold of the night. 

She didn t know what was she doing. Sneaked out of the house to patrol without Red or Spike for the first bloody time.

And she just used the b-nancy-boy word. 

«Probably turning into a nancy-girl.»

She stops. Felt something there, some strange tingle in the back of her neck, like she s being watched. 

Keeps on walking. Passes by the street where her observer was, so she presumed.

She wasn t afraid of puting matters into her own hands. Not anymore.

Especially when she knew that Red casted a protectiion spell on her. Yeah, she knew that.

Used the oportunity to go clubin at the Bronze once in a while, not just patroling.

But….the patroling was a worthy chalenge too. It made her blood all warm and hyper.

Never before could she feel something like that.

She walked into the street and put her hand in the dark curtain of night. And pulled out a cold body of……

A person! 

A person she nearly staked.

She could hardly control herself. It was pure instinct. No thinking about much anymore.

And that pale person wasn t just an ordinary person.

It was a guy from the Sunnyhell High school. 

A guy that Cassie liked.

«Wonder if the other slayers ever had problems like this?»-she wondered.

«Soooo…..»-the guy looked at the stake in her hand.

She wasn t realising that until she just woke up from the schok of almost putting the woden body of it into his heart.

She put it away. 

«So….what were you doing?»

«Well…..I was noticing a girl walking in the middle of a dark and dangerous street all alone.

A girl who s really taking the self-defence clases way too seriously.

What a hell did you think while pointing that thing on me?!»

«Well…I…I kinda…I was kinda scared. And just acted on my reflecs. Sorry.»

He laughs.

This makes Cassie feel uncomfortable. 

But he was laughing to the fact that she just pulled that stunt. 

«There ain t lot of em like you, right?»

«Last time I counted, no.»

He had the sweetest smile. She could drown in it. 

Then she notices someone getting out of the street thru a back way out of a chinese restoran. 

She put two and two together. 

Started walking forward.

«Did you hear that sound?»

«What sound?»

«The sound of trying to open and close the doors without making a sound. Did you hear it?»

«I don t think so.»-he started to follow. 

Then stepped in front of her and huged her with his strong arms. 

«You re a special little cookie, you know that?»

That was too much flatering for Cassies taste. 

She took her stake out. He didn t even felt it.

Before he even realised the situacion, he turned to dust.

She staked him.

«God, I m good.»-were the words that came from her mouth.

Went in the restorant. A funny looking girl with fake blond hair looked at her and turned her face into an expresion that looked kinda like saying «o shit, I m fucked now».

She tried to get out of there as quickly as possible. 

Cassie folowed her. Soon they were outside. 

The skanky looking girl was a vamp. A vamp that Max back there was protecting.

«Wonder why?»-Cassie jelaously asked herself-«That little skank I m looking at couldn t sire someone even if she got someone to help her with it.»

The figt was embarasingly short. 

«What fight? This doesn t even count. A little scracth!»

Before she staked the vamp, she became quorious when she mentioned something about Buffy. Cassie tuned in.

«What do you know about Buffy?»

«What are you gonna give me if I talk?»

«Your undead freakin life!»-Cassie said while pushing the stake in her heart. She could imagine how it must hae been painful.

«Okay, okay. Just get cool a bit….and olive green…»-she noged her head to the slayers shirt-«…is totally so NOT your color.»

«What da hell are you jackering about? Tell me what I won t or..»

«Okay! Chees, loosin up. My name is Harmony but people tend to call me Harm…»

«Such a good name for her.»-Cassie thought.

«…And I knew Buffy. Before she died. I survived her, you know.»

«Aha, so what can you tell me about her?»

«Well her stile-not so fashion like. And popularity-the bottom. Like complete bottom if you know what I m saying. She wasn t good enough. Not for me. 

She could never kill me…..»

Harmony kept on talking and then she turned to dust. 

«Now she was a boring little vamp. Better than Buffy. Ha! Who does she think she is?»

It s five in the morning. 

In exactly two hours Cassie needs to teare her tired eyes awake and go to school, act out a normal life. And try to look like she s sorry for Max disapearing and all.

He was a vamp. A souless vamp. She wasn t sorry bout it at all.

But she got to be sorry in two days when she visited his mother with the rest of her classmates. She was sorry when she saw her tears, her light-off eyes full of hope that was all in vain. He won t come back. Ever.

He won t be alive. Never. 

But above all she stood her ground. 

Never stoped doing that. No one could dare to tell her that she was wrong.

«Yep! She s a good one alright. Remindes me of….of….»

«Buffy?»

«No. Not Buffy. Not anymore. 

She reminds me of a cold rock. With a heart burried deep inside.»


	7. Inoscence lost

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: BTVS-Joss, UPN, WB, Mutant Enemy

                   Cassie-MINE!

NOTE: Can t help myself. Godda write. 

Distribution: e-mail me and ask.

«To be haunted is to glimpse a truth that might best be hidden.»

                                            James Herbert

The things we leave behind

Chapter seven-Inoscence lost 

By Slaya

It was a cold damp cave. She felt so lost inside. 

But she was safe. For awhile. 

The fire burned warm. Every part of her body felt reliefed. 

«Love isn t such a simple thing. 

It s very complicated….you know. It can never be too much. 

But it can always be….naaaah,. I m not gonna tell you. You re young. Believe in love while you can. Caus I m just five by five and really fine. 

Caus… .you know, since I ve died, I ve noticed things that were never ever so relevant. 

Maybe I m just talking bullshit.»-a dark haired girl was saying-«But…. how can you love someone who s hurting you?!?»-she screamed as Cassie twiched, suddenly like there was something teribly wrong.

She disapears, morphs into a nuder being. A nuder woman, also with dark hair, but blue, cold eyes. She could judge everyone in the world with that cold winter blaizing inside. 

«Do you even know who I am?»-she asked Cassie.

«No, I don t. Who are you?»

«Hm. All of the trouble, all of the torchure and the damn 140 mile run, but still…..no one knows who I am.»-she turns to face Cassie.

«I know who you are. You are Casandra. And you see the future, the past and the present. You shall die young, but you do not believe it. Even if the idea came out of your own mind.

You are the slayer. The one who will face the powers of darkness like the many before you.

But you do not know the women who indeed were the ones in your place miles ago. For I am one of them.

I am Thessily. And I have slayed for almost eighteen years or so.

I no longer remember.

I m fading, my memory is fading, everything will soon be lost.

But remember little girl. You have seen Thessily. The slave girl that came to be a slayer.

It stands for something.»

Silence. 

Blood started to drip from somwhere above on Cassies hand. She had this dream often. Never the same. But always so strangley vivid. 

She knew it was a dream. She knew that she was seing the slayers. The past and the future. 

She feels a hand on her shoulder. 

A hand that knocks her to the ground. 

«You should guard your back a little bit better.»-said a girl with a starnge accent. 

Her neck was all bloody. She died in a very scary way.

Cassie recognized this one. Her name was Kendra. She came after Buffy and before Faith. 

«You re Kendra.»

«Just because you can name the game doesn t mean that you can play it.

I knew the name of my death to be. 

And look at me now. Do I seem alive to you?»

«Don t scare the girl.»-Cassie heard a familiar voice. Buffy. She was always cooming to the rescue. Some slayer s weren t so…….nice.

«You don t have a say in this.»

«Yes I do. I ve been a visitor here lot longer than you. Sorry…but bye.»

Kndra vanished.

«Thank you.»

«I m not gonna be here always. 

How are Willow and Spike?»

«They re good.»

«What about Dawn, and the others?»

«They re not saying anything about her. Anya died a day ago. They wanted to keep it hush-hush for me, but….I managed to find out. 

A demon killed her. 

Xander and Tara went out of the town. Took Dawn along.»

«So she s changing schools again?»

«Yeah.»

She tried not to mencion anything about Anya, pretended not to care. But she did care. 

Couldn t find her peace. She had to be in the new slayer s head. 

She said nogthing more. 

And Cassie woke up. 

Read the newspaper before she went to school.

There was an article about the «strange dissapearence of Casandra Lewis».

They printed her picture a couple of times.

She and Red casted a few spells. So that no one could recognise her. 

It was so really strange, but she didn t miss her family. Here and now. 

She has truly known the meaning of freedom. Just to slay and to play the game. It was just that. Nogthing else.

She walked to school. Everybody just passed her not even looking at her. 

She was a geek, a weirdo or whatever they called her.

And it wasn t fair.

She saved they re egsistance lots of times, again and again every time she slayed a vamp. 

That s people for you. 

Sickening, diskusting, ungrateful and stupid.

Living just to eat, sleep, piss, shit and be (by Spikes definition) happy meals on legs. 

«God, I m starting to sound like a vamp. What s wrong with me?

Even a slayer is human. I m human. Wait.

Someone told me that once.»

In her dream. It was Nikki.

«To save the lie, it s a trickening tide.»

Sonja.

«Death is a friend.»

The first slayer.

«You know me, five by five.»

Faith.

«The Roman emperor has a trick too many up his sleave. You better watch it. He s gonna fool you.»

Diana.

«Hey, we have the same name. Casandra.»

Casandra Marsilka. A vamp didn t kill her. Died on the stakes, the poor girl. 

«The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain. Or something like that. It s all very relative. Not in the way they have taught us. 

And they have taught us wrong.»

Virginia Dare. 

She, as her name said it, dared to do a lot. 

«Be sharp, be quick. Stay with yourself. Don t go anywhere.»

Ildiko Gellert.

«In my country there is sand, sand till infinity brakes up with the tiny particles of dust. 

And they re there also. Can t avoid them. Godda stand in the front lines of the war where truth and love are the first to bite the dust. 

Death.

We love it. We dance with it. We live it.»

Shagrat al-Durr.

«Faries are glisenin and we are all one big happy family. And in my mind I saw the vampire with words just like mine. And I saw her kill one of us. 

I don t know who that was. Could it be you?»

Marie Christine Du Lac.

She sacrifised much. She was a frernch noble woman. She saw things long before she became the One.

To be a slayer. It turned her life upside down. The total oposite of everything that she s been taught. 

«The memory of the fight remains like a sweet flower kiss to my cheek.»

Claudine.

«I loved him. More than anything else. 

So he left me at the darkest of the recked clouds. Alone. All alone in the dark.»

Elizabeth Weston.

«Bees, little bees busing aroung. 

It s all about the power. Who has it. And how s he using it. The bees use chemicals to enchant the others into mesmoration. 

Of our beloved nation.

It doesn t make sence.»

Justine.

«Keep it real. Keep it short. Don t listen to the rest of them. They haven t seen what I have. It s in my mind. Say stop.

They lie to you. You don t know the truth.»

Lucy Hanoower.

«The true power lies in: focus, agility, ability, strenght, courage and by far most…love.»

Angela Martignetti.

A beautiful italian. She was…..different. She was unique. Warm.

«I m so full of that damned grace.»

Grace.

«The face of my death is now the face of your teacher. Listen to him well. For he knows how to brake the laws and to win. I didn t stand a chance. 

But the path is more important than the goal. Remember that well.»

Xin Rong.

Spike killed her.

«Remember me. Will you?

Arrabela Gish.

«Wisdom is such a relative term. Everything is relative. 

The fact that you see me, even if I m dead is relative. You can never know what to think.

Here, we find the beauty of it all.»

Britta Kessler.

«The war was an ugly little freak of nature.»

Sophie Cartsensen.

«I find them and I kill them. No mercy. 

No looking at life or love. It is forbiden. It is dangerous. Doesn t anybody know that love doesn t have mercy?

De donde erres?

You haven t been here for very long, haven t you.»

Isabel Cortes. 

«Let live and love.»

India Cohen.

«You can t see me, you can t feel me. 

I ll be the one that you ll find dancing on your grave.»

Austin.

«The iron fist is what you little girl need.»

Anna Kuei.

«The future holds many secrets. It s up to you to make them all go away.

Everything you see here, or on the outside……………

It is all a lie. 

Can bouch for that.»

Melaka Fray.

«Get yourself together. You re sickening to me. 

Blood on your hands. That s not a big deal.»

Mariko.

«How to begin? This was all such a blow into my mind. Probably feeling the same way, right? Well…it s been fun. Godda go.

No fun talking to a person who lived before I was even born.

Later girlfriend.

Pusa iz dubine mog srca.»

Ivana Pavlovna.

And here comes Buffy Anne Summers, one of Cassie s favorites. She was always staying sain, not like the others. They sometimes hurt her in more ways than one.

«Just live. For me.

Don t die caus you wanna be me.

A hero.

You already are that.»

«I am the first, I am the last.»

The first slayer.

Cassie has been dreaming about them ever since the first night that she s been called. 

She talks to them, listens to them. Looks at the things that happened to them. 

They have one thing in common, all of them do.

They miss to be alive, the slaying, the death around them, let it be painful as it is, but they need death around them to make them stand on their toes. 

And that s what makes their inoscence lost.

They re not little children. Neither is Cassie anymore.

She s one of them now. 

No loss, no cost appeared. Yet.

The first ray s of sun in the morning touches Cassies hair. Makes it glisening. Makes it warm.

But little did she know, this is not gonna be a warm day. 


	8. Not such a warm day after all

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: Nogthing is mine exepct Cassie. Get the picture?

NOTE: I m feeling at «the high» now. 

My inspiration just blossomed after the last chapter.

Distribution: Definetly wanna know where it goes. 

And also, it would be nice to ask.

The things we leave behind

Chapter eight: Not such a warm day after all

By Slaya

Deep relief has managed to get out of her with a loud sigh when the teacher didn t gave her an F caus of her general non-egzisting knowledge about the second world war. 

«You have no respect for history, neither for the dead.»-the dull old lady said to her.

Cassie couldn t do anything (she could but….she has a secret identity to hold hush and hush). She just thought of some good things that would be graceful to do to the old hag.

«No respect for the dead, what da hell is she thinking?»

The dead are in her head for the whole night. She deserves to be left alone during the day.

The other kids were ignoring her as usual. «Selfish little asses of idiot pricks thinking they re «so cool», when they re jerks with false smiles and atitudes to just die of embarasment. Quaint.»

It all seemed normal in this strange and warm day. It all seems so invisible to the naked eye. 

Only a slayer, a witch, a vampire, a demon or some other baddie or sort of a strange creature would sence everything hiding from behind of the glanced and perky clean surface. 

Caus this was Sunnydale. The home of the always apealing tourist resourt, the HELLMOUTH.

The air became different. And everything seemed to change rapidly. 

A new sound emerged from the halways of the school. 

Cassie noticed them and recognized. 

Someone was casting a spell.

Not a good one, some evil spell caused by hatred, jelauosy or maybe both.

If Red could be here, she would sniffed it out like a bloodhound. 

«Bloody brightly bleeding  redish red-riding hood witchie bloodhound.»-stood Spikes definition of Red s capability.

Never the less-something was wrong. 

Cassie sneaked out of class to check it out.

Well….it wasn t sneaking out as it was ignoring the old hag who was screaming, «Where are you going?»

She stood in the hallway, closing her eyes. She s doing what Red taught her to do. She became one with the world, in her mind. Now she could feel everything wrong that was happening.

It came from a bathroom, she was sure of that, but didn t know wich one. 

A cold feeling went over her. Now she could ear sounds that were almost human. 

«What da hell is that?»

Kendra apeared behind her out of nowhere. 

«How many times do I have to say: guard yi back.», then she whispers in Cassie s ear, «Be careful now, this is a big bite for you to chew.»

This was something new, slayers not apearing in dreams anymore, but in the middle of the day. To some people, this would mean that they ve gone completley mad and insane.

To Cassie it just meant that her back was guarded safely. They would never openly told her that, but they re watching out for her.

She took a deep breath as Kendra was gone. Cassie looked inside the nearest bathroom thru a crack in the doors edge. 

It was one of the students. 

How ironicly, the girl s name was Blair. 

The air was thickening around her as she was saying words that sounded nasty to Cassies trained ear. 

She wanted to jump inside and to stop her before she saw the necklace around the girls neck. It was a strange symbol. There were people around town with the same thing on their stupid little necks, not a lot of them but…. too many.

«It s here because of the ritual.»-Cassie figured out, her eyes widen of something that could be called fear. She didn t know who or what they were calling but it was something big.

She knew that this she couldn t face alone. 

«I better just come back with Red. It s not like I can do anything now. Red could.»

As she was turning around, she caught a glimpse of a sharp knife. Blair was about to cut herself, the idiot full. 

Now Cassie had to intervene. 

And so she did. And she got her ass kicked from the thickening air around the girl. She was helpless while the girls blood raned down her cut hands and to the floor, all around the black star on the floor. It even got on Cassies clothes. 

Helpless. A new feeling to experience as a slayer.

She thrown her bag on the floor and started runing out. 

The doors in the yard were closed. The princibal aproached and said something really ridicolus, she wasn t paying atencione.

Climbed the wall and ran back as fast as she could to the house. 

Some girl on the street looked a lot like Blair, Cassies sister Blair. 

But she thought it was just her mind playing tricks on her. Again. 

The doors of the house were closed and locked. She left the key in her bag. Her bag was in school on that pile of blood. 

«God, why does this always happen?!?»-she thought in panic.

A brick that was left laying outside became a helpfull tool to her as she broke the window glass caus no one was answering to her. She knew for a fact that Red must be home. 

But at first sight there was nobody.

After a few moments Red came down wearing a pare of  high boots and a coat. Under the coat she probably wore a short skirt or something.

Strange. She didn t like short skirts. «And why is she wearing the coat? Was she going somewhere?»

Her make-up was all messy and her hair not tied in a pony-tail or something like she always wore it. It was just spilled across her shoulders.

She looks at the window. «Are you just kinda more crazy than Buffy was?»

Then she came quiet. She just compared Cassie with Buffy. 

For the first time like this. Out loud.

«I m sorry sweetie.»-she said, but didn t try to hug her or anything. 

That was strange. For one moment Cassie forgot about the spell she just whitnesed and everything. 

«Red.»

«Yeah?»

«Is there somebody up there?»

Red s face freezes in a mind-blowing blush and starts mumbleing about how she spent the day alone, all alone.

Cassie found it hard to believe especially since there was nogthing underneath that coat. 

«I m not mad, why should I be. Who is it?»

«N…n..no..n..no one. No one. No! 

It s….a…it s…stupid to think that I would, or….that…..he would….»

«He would what?»

«He would never be evil or something, so what if he doesn t have a……o my!»

«A soul?»

«I didn t say that.»

«I need your help.»

«Okay. I ll go get dressed.»

Red now felt kinda inferior to Cassie caus she felt like betraying her in a way. 

Then Spike came down  not being able to look at her in straight in the eyes. 

«What can I do?»

«So that s why you were saying to me that I should go patroling on my own the last couple of days.»

«Now look here pet.»-he realised that he had nogthing to say or argument, even if it s a far end revolved lie. It all came off blank. 

«I guess you can join me and Red when night falls.»

«Sure thing.»

«This is so great. I should catch them doing it more often from now on. They kinda lose credibility and give me the chance to boss them around a little bit.»

Then the thought of Blair back at the school washed her over. 

And it all felt like cold ice in the sun.

«What was she doing?»

«What are you wondering bout, duck?»

«There s something big cooming this way.»

«It always is. Never small, mark my words.»

«What s wrong?»-Red asked while entering the room now fully dressed.

Cassie didn t have to give her a look twice. 

Red closed her eyes only to open them full of tears that won t fall, with only one word on her mouth: 

«Black.»


	9. Big bad redish black

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: same as in the last chapters.

Distribution: ASK

NOTE: The character of Lumiere is based on the Marvel comics character Remy «Gambit» LeBeau. He belongs to them. I m just borowing.

The things we leave behind

Chapter nine-The black

By Slaya

«I m so full of that damned grace.»

«Black what?»-Cassie managed to say before Red colapsed.

Something big is coming, no question about that. But who called it? And why?

Thoose are questions left wondering in the dark. 

«Those people wish to be imortal, they wish to be gods, demons or whatever. 

That s why they re bringing this evil to Sunnydale.»

«What kind of evil, pet?»

«Evil without name or face. Just a wawe of blackness that comes thru you.»

«From where do you know all this? You ve stumbled upon it before?»

«Now duck rest with the questions a little bit. She needs to get back together.»

«Well…yeah. I think she was eghausted even before she saw it. Before that she saw something else. But it didn t scare her as well as the big bad likes to talk about himself.»-Cassie teased looking at Spike. 

He didn t answer her. Just toke care of Willow. 

The day when he first got the chip in his head emerged into his mind. He tried to bite Red. But couldn t. And she was okay with it (offcourse she s gonna be okay with NOT being a vampire snack). 

And now he has the chance to get the chip back out, leave Sunnyhell and find Dru again. Or just make a nuder Dru. 

«No, that couldn t happen, I couldn t do it. There s just one Dru. 

Just one Dru.»

«Hey, cherie! What is such a lovely little petit doing out here on this cold night so alone.»-a well built man said to a beautiful young woman. 

She was qurious to see who he was, how was he on the «looks» part.

But but she fled as soon as he revealed his burning red eyes without anything white in them. Just burning red.

He took a deep sigh, «Always the same. Pourqoi? Lumiere no good for you?»

«Well….Lumiere keeps talking to himself in the third person and he s a demon. 

I don t think that the girls are such suckers for that.»-a male voice behind him answers.

He emerges from the silence of the night. A old man in a black suit. 

«So….why am I here in Sunnydale? Nogthing ever happens  here old man.»

«And this is where you re wrong. This is the hellmouth. And maybe, just maybe….it will open. 

POW!»-the man expresses the hellmouth opening with a big sound and a clap of his hands.

«Yeah, so? What Lumie got to do with it?»

«You get to be human. And unefected from the whole hellmouth thing. It won t be able to touch you.»

Lumiere wasn t all that trusting and the sort but he s been dealing with Black a few times before and he knew that there was no deal that he wouldn t keep. 

«So what does Lomie have to do?»

«Just one simple thing. Distract the only one who can stop us.»-the man started wickering and laughing.

«The slayer.»

«A what?»

«A slayer, god damn it!»

«That s what you are?»

«Yes!»

«No. No, no, no! YOU my dear have completley lost it. What did these people do to you?»-Blair stood in the living room of the house, over the shatered glass while red was unconcious on the couch.

«Stop acting like a fool….o wait. You ARE a fool!»

«Hey. Would you two shut it down a bit. She s in pretty bad shape.» 

«Sorry»-Cassie said, but not Blair. She just kept on screaming.

«Do you know what have you done to our poor mother? Ha? Do you?»

This was picking up too much time. Blair suceded in dumping the guilt wagon on Cassie, but that didn t stop her not to say the words in latin that Blair didn t understand. 

She walked out the door.

Quietly.

«That should keep her out of my hair for a while.»

«Where did you sent her?»

«Home. I hope she gets there before the spell wears off.»

«Where did she see you?»

«In the town, when I ran back here.»

«Oh.»

Red started to wake up.

«What did you see?»-Cassie couldn t bring herself not to ask. 

«What?»

«Don t tell me that she bloody doesn t remember.»

«Remember what? The dream I had?»

«You had a dream?»

«Mmmm…yes, yes I did!»

«What was it about?»

«I saw an old man and a nuder one, not old…kinda cute actually and he had flaming red eyes. Burning. 

It was so vivid. Like it really happened for real.»

«Are you sure it wasn t real pet? you looked pretty like the vision state thing.»

«But it was night. And whatever happened, it s over now. 

We need to…need to…act completley normal. It s a big chance that they don t know who the new slayer is. Yet.

We need to act normal Cassie! Let me and Spike go on patrol from now on, please.»

Her pleading sounded so desperate even if Cassie knew that that was a promise she could not keep…she simply said «Yes». 

Red stood up and slowly walked upstairs, all shaken up and relieved. 

«If the mear vision of this caused this to her…»-Cassie was wondering-«…then what will the real live figure of it do?»

Spike looked after her, on the emty steps where once lived his beloved Buffy Summers.

Some strange guilt caught in his eye. But Cassie was too blind to notice. 

Because fear was all that she was feeling. And agrivation maybe, yes, a little bit of agrivation cause of Blair s arival.

This is all for real for once. As to now she got used to being the strongest one in combat, the slayer who is far more superior than the vampire. And even if she slipped a little…..there were Red and Spike always ready to help.

This is gonna burn her skin when it gets as near as it needs to be. 

And after it burns the skin it will decapitate her weak and fragile body. Maybe she ll get to die earlier then she thought.

Just an ordinary thing in her line of work.

But for now…..she needs to act like an ordinary kid. No problems that include slaying or saving the world.

To keep her identity hush-hush. It s tough.

You can never know what can crop up around the corner.

Till you see it.

And bloody well face it.

The battle remains a secret. The time, place. Dimension even.

«Are you okay pet?»

«I m fine.», she sighs, «Just scared. A bit. Well…actualy a lot. 

Yeah. Real lot.»

This new thing cooming. Is it really gonna be as scary as it looks like?»

«More. Lot more duck. 

It always is. Can t help that.»

She puts her head deep down.

«You re just greenish a bit. It will come off.

Eventually. 

Till then…me and Red will always be here.»

He made her smile. The first time after a long time. It wasn t fiting in into her life anymore. Actually…..it never did.

Little did Cassie know that he was slowly but surely switching sides. Making a pact with the devil, better known as Black.

«So….if I do that for you, you ll get the soddin chip out?»

«Never go back on my word. Just put it into her drink or food. It won t kill her, it will just make her weak for a while.»

«And Cassie?»

«Get her out of our way, or better yet: out of town, and she ll be spared.

And hey! She ll be alive to see the dawn of the new day. 

A bargain that can not be refused.»

«I don t know bout the refusing part, but I m perfectly okay with it.»

«So is it a deal?»

«It s a deal.»


	10. Substitute for love

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: BtVS-Joss & co.

                   Gambit (the character of Lumiere is based on him)-Marvel comics…etc…

You get the picture.

NOTE: Enjoy the ride!

The things we leave behind

Chapter ten-Substitute for love

By Slaya

«The face of you

My substitute for love

My substitute for love

Should I wait for you

My substitute for love

My substitute for love

Famous faces 

Far off places

……………..

No handsome stranger

Heady danger

Drug that I can try

No feres wheel

No heart to steal

No laughter in the dark

No one night stand

No far off land

No fire that I can spark

                      Madonna

«Let s just say, feeling something-is better than feeling nogthing.»

                                   Justine

                                             Ats

Spike went out on patrol. 

So that Cassie can rest a little, relax. And not reveal her slayer nature to someone who could take advantage of it.

As it seems….this was a lie. 

Instead of patroling he watched how the «begers», the people who called upon this horrid entity were doing a sacred ritual of giving their soul and faith in the hands of the man called Black. 

Even as it may seem like it, Black was not the one in charge. It was someone far more greater than him. 

Spike idn t know who that was. Didn t care.

Just wanted the whole thing over so that he can get the chip out, end the endless sharade with Red and be securer at the thought that he kept Cassie from being hurt.

This watcher stuff…an all.

It wasn t him.

Everybody were gone. Buffy was gone. The little nibblet Dawn was gone. 

What da hell was he suppossed to do? 

He wanted to be back on the old track. This time for good. 

Caus he couldn t feel anything anymore. Like a dead shell. Just playing with the part they asined him to play.

As a real evil vamp without a chip in his scull….he could feel pain as it was pleasure. It was so empty.

But so forgeting. 

And so real that it had to be fake.

Cassie put Red to bed, she has made sure that there re no problems what so ever.

Went back to the school for her bag. A couple of guys were untastefully hitin on her. 

So she beat them up. Why?

A simple question. And it has a very simple answer.

Because she bloody well can!

Violence. A second nature to her, to all the slayers. 

They have all felt the same way. Resolve your problems with the best weapon that you have. With your body.

«The best that you ll ever have.»

Austin said that couple of nights ago. 

And guess what? She was right.

They all see the answers in violence and get off in kicking somebody s ass out of the field. 

Not just the slayers. Witches too.

Willow among the others. 

Protection spells, spells for the fun of it, venegance spells (she never told Cassie anything about it, but…).

We all have a dark side to ourselfes. 

It s a dark alley. And a cold one. Just as Cassie loves them so much. 

«Maybe I m kinda like Faith, more than any other slayer.»

She got used to loving it. The darkness, the hunt, the victory. 

It s normal for her to get scared when things tend to turn around. Like now.

She hears steps behind her. 

They re familiar. So she doesn t worry. Why should she? It s Faith. 

And in front of her…there goes Buffy. It s a dream.

«It must be a dream.»

The two of them meet, not like friends. Faith has done a lot to her. It s not so easy to forgive her.

But then again Faith needed help desperatly. It wasn t fair from Buffy not helping her.

Then again…they both have their scars to heal. 

Cassie was left as a by stander. This was gonna be interesting.

For the first time now, Buffy and Faith were completley ignoring her. They weren t here to help her or talk to her. They were here just so that they can turn her mind into their little battleing ground. 

How cute.

They started talking quietly, Cassie could not understand a word. 

Then it became faster and louder.

«Oh, like you don t dig it.»

«I don t.»

«You re a liar. I ve seen you. Tell me staking a vamp doesn t get you a little bit juiced. Come on, say it.»

«You got off on it. Killing those slayers.»-Buffy stared into the blank behind Faith as the image of Spike emerged. 

Now Cassie could recognise the alley. It was the one behind the Bronze.

«Hm. Like you always were. Ignoring me every step of the way B. You bitch!», Faith didn t want to just wanish as usual. 

«Like you don t? How many of us have you killed?»

«I have killed….many. what difference does it make?»

«Imagine how those bodies used to be human. Imagine how they became dead vamps. And imagine how you killed the bodies. And by doing so you killed the last shred of humanity left.

Face it. You re a killer luv. 

And that s just the you I like the most.»

He became darker. More evil. Cassie had never seen him like this.

He was almost over-powering Buffy. Like she was in his control.

It was scary to look at.

«Oh, come on C. Don t tell me that you re down. Tell me the truth.»

Cassie knew what she wanted to hear.

«Just five by five.»

«There you go C! Doesn t that feel better now?

Now, there s just one more thing.»

«And what s that?»

«Wake up….»-her voice became whoosy and all melting-slow-motion kind, slow, like she wanted to rock her to sleep in a dream, like it was real-«…you re late.»

«Late to what?»-she said while falling out of her cold bed. Just the way she liked it. 

It s three AM in the morning. 

Spike s on patrol.

«Slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay, slay….»

The little voice inside her head whispered. 

She craved it, wanted it so badly. The kinda dark side of it. The idea that you can get away with murder.

Spike is checking the cementery, he said that he doesn t have enough time to check everything.

«If he s in the cementery, I ll be at the other side of town. Near «The Bronze». And the rest…

maybe I check the school. Never know what can hide in boring old history hags closets.»

It didn t took her much time to completley forget everything about what Willow said. 

It was the high. She felt the high.

«Not even two-hundred wild horses straped on your back could stop you when you get the high. Use the sensation well. Don t let it use you.»

A whole bundle of slayers. A whole lot of advices and everything else. 

The door didn t make a sound while they were closed. The broken window was all covered up. Everything seemed okay on the outside. 

And (for the time being) everything was okay on the inside. 

A couple of blocks later Cassie spotted two vamps. Mindlessly tossing their dead bodies across the street. There is no humanity in them. No way. 

Even if it was there, just a tincy bit of it. No.

Cassie would be glad to kill it off, to stop it from suffering in the demons body and mind.

Here comes the time. 

She takes her stake out. Runs up to them, not from behind, but from the front. Very strange for a slayer that s been slaying for four weeks barely.

She smacked the first one straight into the nose that started to bleed. The other one dig his foot into her stomach.

It caused a feeling of throwing up all that she s eaten the present day (that actually happened to her once).

«Not this time.»

She got to her feet and fought with the both of them at the same time.

Then she got an idea. She started to run. They thought they were too strong. So they followed. 

She put the act long enough for them to buy it, after they got her cornored. She even droped her stake. Delibaretly. 

It s not like she didn t have a spear one. 

All the acting and lieing. Just so that she could strike again. And again.

To kill. 

«To kill 

Is to breathe

For you are the one

That s been left standing alive.»

Virginia composed this nifty little poem. A dear dangerous girl that she was. 

She stakes the first vamp. The stronger one is still alive. And very pissed off.

Cassie tries to punch him, but he took her hand and broke her left wrist with a strong squieze.

The pain was barely felt. 

It was the sound.

The sound of her bone being broken and left weaken and helpless. 

She knew that it s not gonna make a difference. Now or a second later.

Gosebumps emerged all over her skin while she hasn t let out a single sound. The vamp was kinda suprised. 

Then after letting her go, he punched her nose. She licked the blood that fell to her lip. 

He lifted her up and thrown her violently to the ground. 

The air was all soft and fun. The ground were all about no play. 

It was something in the pain.

She felt it and knew that she was still alive. 

She knew that she s gonna get out of this alive, that she s gonna get up the second that the vamp puts her down. 

He thought that she s too weak. The same mistake, twice now. 

A steak apears in her left arm, the third one. She always had at least four with her.

«A slayer must always reach for her weapon. Caus I already got mine.»

This time the pain was so strong that she had to scream when she staked him. With her left hand, her left broken wrist.

The dust came all over her clothes. 

«Dead, dead, 

Half dead…and still alive and well

O the pain you beare

Being the One

You must have a reason

To escape us so subtle

When it depends on you...»

Anna Kuei said. 

«…When you dance.»

Cassie wanted to touch her. 

But Anna turned into a mist before that could happend. 

Somebody else was here.

«What is such a nice little cherie doing in an alley this cold and dark? Maybe Lomie can do something about that.»

She waited till the man put his hand on her shoulder. 

Then she fliped him over her like there was nogthing to it. It toke him by suprise. 

Cassie noticed his flaming red eyes. Red said something about flaming red eyes. Well now…..to late to hide the slayer identity. 

He wasn t a vamp, but a stake isn t just a nifty weapon for killing vampires. It works it s magic on all alike. Humans, vampires, demons, werewolfs, strange red-eyed (completley cute) creatures  and so on.

She sat up on him while holding his hands above his head with her right hand. 

«Who are you?»

He didn t answer. Just put on the tough guy talk.

«Lumie is used to taking the first step, but if you re wiling….Lumie won t argue with that.»-he said in a french, cajun accent. Cassie couldn t help but notice that this asshool talks about himself in the third persons pov. 

«I guess I didn t make myself clear.», she slaped him, «Who da hell are you?»

Lumie was suprised when she let his hands loose when she slaped him. It was a sighn of weakness that he won t forget for a long time. 

He changes the cards. Uses the oportunity to roll over so that now she s under him. 

Now he sees the wrist. It looked bad when it got broken, but by now it morphed into a body part that didn t look like it was human. All sorts of little bones sticking out. 

He presed hard on it. 

Cassie tried not to scream, but she had to. 

«Hm. Now we re talking. 

No fun when the pain hits you, a cherie?»

«Sod off.», she used Spikes curse. She didn t know why. To feel stronger, caus things weren t looking up on her right now. 

«A girl in your position shouldn t say things like that.

Now let Lumie take a look at that hand.», he takes her hand and looks at it.

«This wasn t done by a vamp. Well…by some part. You did the rest petit.»

She froze when he said it. He knew that she was the slayer. Who knows for how long he s been standing there. 

She fucked up things big now.

Red s word s were ecoing thru her head.

Act normal. They don t know. 

Well…now they do.

He noticed it. The slight change of atitude. He made a funny grim as he done something to her. She wasn t sure what exactly, but then he got off of her, took her by her left hand. And it didn t hurt. The bones were all back in place. 

Cassie was no fool. She let him pick her up just before she used all the strenght that she had left to flip him over her, again, and run like hell. 

The old man named Black apeared before him.

«I said kill the slayer, not heal her. You re cooming to be a dissopointment to us.»

«Stop the crap for once! Lumiere is going to fix it.»

«Like you fixed her hand?»

«Like I fixed her  hand.»

«Well you better. Cause there are other assasins out there looking to claim the prize on her head.»

Lumiere stoped listening to him. He had to find the slayer.

«Lumie be damned if he let a little girl trick him like that, make him lose his prize.»

Cassie ran till she couldn t run anymore. She sat in a dark corner. 

An arrow came out of nowhere, missed her head by a centimeter or so. The next one punctured her right hand. Traped her to the wall.

She pulled it out, didn t care about the pain. The pain was irrelevant. 

Her life was the most important thing now. 

She can t go on slaying without it.

A yellow colored creature comes to her. 

«O I shall claim my sweet revard faster than I thought.

And Black, that fool thought that you might be a problem.»

Black. Red said that. «So that s who I need to hunt down and kill.», she thought. 

But the yellow demon punched her a few times. Just for the kick out of it. 

She was completley sure that she s gonna die now. 

But the man who named himself as Lumie came and killed off the demon with ease. 

He took cards out of his coat and made them glow. They exploded after he has let them lose at the demon. 

Now he looked at Cassie.

She realised that he s on the same mission, just like the yellow creature.

And she was prepared to die. It was bound to happen sooner or later. A slayer is a weapon that spends itself till the point she has nogthing else to do but lay down and die.

He saw it in her eyes. 

The reward that he wanted for her death was his own humanity. He was sick and tired of the demon world. He wanted to be human again. 

But how can he kill this little child and live with himself? 

Especally once when he gets genuine human conhcense. 

Cassie closed her eyes. 

«I don t wanna see the look on his face.»

«I m gonna let you off the hook for now. But the next time we meet, remember my words cherie, there will be no second chances.

Go now.»

She opens her eyes. 

«No.»

«What?»

«No. You should know that if you let me go….you won t get a second chance.»

«Let Lumie get this straight. You re wounded and weak. I could kick your petit ass to the ends of the world…..and you won t go. What is it?

Do you really want to die? Caus if you do, Lumie s gonna be happy to satisfy the need. And others if you have them.»

«You re sick.»

«Maybe. But I m kind enough to let you go. So go.»

He was stronger than her. Anybody could have seen that. 

It s best that for now  she bows her head down and goes. The next time she sees him, she can t allow that. Not the second time. 

«You kill me, you become me and you aren t ready for that yet.»

                                                          Faith


	11. Power

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: bla bla bla

same as it was

distribution: ASK

The things we leave behind

Chapter eleven-Power

By Slaya

«…scientists and philosophers administered beatings to dogs with perfect indifference and made fun of people who believed the creatures felt pain and therefore pitied them. They insisted that the animals were like clocks; that the cries they emitted when struck were only the noises of some little spring that had been triggered by the blow, but that the animal itself has absolutley no feeling…»

                                        Jean de la Fontaine s journalistic account of experiments

He went back to the «gathering» asking himself why did he spear her life. He was getting old. And soft.  He wanted to be human for so long. 

He forgot the taste of it. 

It s not empty pain. It s living and breathing. 

It s emotions that you don t get while you re a demon.

Lumiere started seriously question the last part. What was he thinnking? It couldn t be a feeling. Or maybe……how couldn t he think of it sooner. 

The girl must be a telepath. Cause he reacted in such way. To them. Telepaths.

All the way. Since he was human.

A boy actually, barely twenty years old. In gay Parie, France. 

He was a thief. Picked pockets all his life. 

Never learned anything else. Never could. 

He was maturing quite quickly. So from a mear thief he became a murderer. But that wasn t all. He did all sorts of nasty things. Torture, rape, murder….there wasn t anything that he didn t trie. Anything that he didn t want to do.

And then there was that night. 

He and his pals robed a wealthy nobleman. Came crashing into his home. They weren t afraid of anything. 

Along with the money they took his daughters. 

But there was a special bonus inside. 

A slayer. A telepath. 

«Marie-Christine Du Lac. Flaming red hair and esquisite manors. She dreaded the filth zhat we were walkin thru. Even so…..she got dirty in the mud. She saved her sisters and royally kicked our asses. Lumies as well. 

Killed the lot of them. A deadly girl. 

Then she look at Lumie….and put the sword down. 

Didn t know then, but know now. She was a telepath.»

«I hear that your girl s gone patroling. That wasn t the deal. There are demons out there who will kill her and get their reward.»

«No! You said that she ll stay bloody well, alive and all nancy dandy fine.»

«Then why are you betraying her?»

A scream interupts their conversation.

«Caus I m a bloody vamp. My days helping the slayer are gone. Now all I wanna do is just get out of her bleeding theder.»

«A question well answered my dear William.»

Blair was one of the most popular girls in school. 

But her eyes were closed all along. It wasn t till the day that she met Elena that they got wide open. For the first time. 

She brought her into the whole magic biz. It was her who lead her to her path of sacrifising herself to save the many that have been left behind. 

And as the demon with a steaming red iron handle aproaches her, she knows that it s all for the good of it. More will come. And more will sacrifice. 

So that the rest can live.

Caus _it _feeds on fear and blood and screams. And pain and torchure and hope washed away in dreadfull tears.

«We must sacrifice for they must live.»

Dawn. A new day arrives. 

Cassie had spent it by acting like not at home. Her sister Blair was back. And she took mom and das for the ride. They kept on knocking and knocking at least an hour. 

It was very anoying. 

Then they left. And silence finally came alive. 

She was flying thru the old books from Red s bookshelf. Nogthing in there made sence to her. And most of it was in latin and some other strange languages. 

She drew a complete blank. 

«If only Red would wake up, feeling all better.»

She stood up to make breakfeast. She ll probably be starving when she wakes up. 

Fried eggs. Some salad. Beacon. Ham. And that s it.

Here ends the culinary depths of one Casandra Lewis. 

The broken wrist didn t look or feel that broken. 

It was in perfect shape, maybe even better than ever. 

And he, that demon refering to himself from the third persona healed it. Why? 

«He needs me dead. Not healed. Maybe I trigured some old wire from the past, maybe some quick fuck with a fellow demon or something like that.

Eww. 

I m not thrilled of thinking that way about myself. Creepy.

And I almost died. But he saved me. It makes sence if there s a reward out on my head or something. Then he must make sure that I die from his hand. 

But…why didn t he kill me then?»

«Ever hear of Slayerfest?», a voice behind her gets her up and about.

«No.»

«Good. But you re about to.

«In short: people and demons wanting to get rid of you for the prize. They are the hunters. And you are the hunted one. 

You just godda put your foot down where it hurts and show them who the real hunter is.

They re not.»

«I am.»

«Yes. Welcome to the Slayerfest. Have fun.»

Buffy. She came again. 

She always does.

She s like a light that shines through the dark. She never stops suprising. 

She s the one who s always….there. 

«Things may not be as they seem.»-some new slayer said. Cassie saw her for the first time now. 

«You don t know me yet. I m Samantha Kane. You can call me Sammy. 

It s okay to call me that, be sure of that.»

«What isn t as it seems?»

«Nogthing is. 

You re seeing of us. can you be sure that we re really the real slayers that once were? How do you know that we re not demons or mear ilusions?

How do you know that you re in good hands?

For how long are they gonna stick around? Do you think you could manage without them? What if they would have left? Right this very moment.

What if your whole family got killed off. Because of you. How would you live with the guilt?

Think about it.»

Cassie put the breakfast on a plate and brought it up to Red. She was still asleep.

It would be a shame to wake her. She s so beautiful when she sleeps. 

Her red hair gets all these strange out-of-this-world kinda shades. Caus it s not natural. 

Red has short hair. She made it long with a spell. 

Punch, punch, punch and punch again. 

The punching bag was really getting the living daylights kicked out of it. 

Hit, hit, hit, hit, hit, hit, hit, hit and hit again.

There was no mercy. 

«The word mercy can t egsist in my damn dictionary!

I know that I m alive here to punch the bag because of mercy, but no. Lumie made a big mistake. It s gonna go back on his head.

And it s gonna be bad.»

Somekind of a horned demmon barges in  the room. Cassie prepared for the fight, put her fists up, but she wasn t fast enough, Spike apeared behind the demon and really kicked his ass.

«Bloody she ll be alright bullshit.»

«What?»

«A…? Nogthing, nogthing, just dribleing nonsence.

Where s Red?»

«She s probably still in bed. I haven t heard her come down. 

It must have got her bad.»

«What got her?»

«The vision.»

«Yeah, yeah…the bleeding vision.»

«Let s go up there.»

«Sure duck.»

«Wait, what about him?»-she points to the ground where a dead demon body was laying.

«Let him be. Maybe he vanishes or does some nancy-girl thing.»

«Okay.»

They walked up to Red s room.

«So….for how long have you and Red been fulling me?»

«Say what?»

«Okay. I can get more graphical, really I can.

No listen very carefully.

For how long have you two been screwing.»

Spike looked astonished. Like he was blaimed for something that he didn t do. 

«Where in the bloody hell did you get those filthy words out of your mouth?!»

Cassie managed not to answer to his question. She opened the door.

But it was strange. Quiet. It s almost dark. 

There s no inoscent Willow-laughter.

The food, the breakfast from the table is untouched. And Red is semingly asleep. 

Cassie walks up to the bed with a cold dread in her heart and butterflies of anticipation in her stomach. Spike gives her a cold glare.

She puts her hand on Red s shoulder. Tries to wake her up. Then she checks her pulse that wasn t there. 

And she turns her cold body face forward. 

«She died in her sleep.

No! It s not fair. I didn t get to say goodbye. Not even goodbye.»-Cassie said falling down on her knees.

«They bloody said that she ll just get weakend, not bloody dead.»

A red alarm gets trigered in Cassies head. She stops crying and forget everything about anything. 

«Are you shure that it will work?»

«Offcourse it will. You see….the slayer is just like a clock, just like a maschine of some sort. It depends on what butons do you press till she goes completley mad….and falls into our arms.»

«The girl no animal mon ami. No maschine either.»

«And behold! This comes from a man who faled to kill her, who actually saved her. 

I m tired of your fooling around. I choose not to have you on my pay rool anymore.

There s no use.»

«You know dat if Lumi don work for you, he be working against you.»

«I m completley aware. So…what are you gonna do? 

Join the slayer. She s gonna dust you in a heartbeat. You don t know what a mad one looks like.»

«O…o…there you wrong mon ami. Lumie knows a mad slayer all too well.»

«We hit her where she hurts and we get what we want.»

«And what du you want?»

«I m gonna tell you just because I have complete trust in dead people to not share a secret.»

Two men grabbed Lumiere from behind.

«We want the despair of a slayer. That is the secret ingredient.»

After that…all Lumie has seen was dark.

«She is a clock, a ticking time-bomb. And she s gonna go off.

If anybody thinks that she really feels pain if we destroy the world…you re wrong!

She s a dirty human. She can t posibly sence like that. She can be sorry but it won t be pain. It won t be pain. 

It doesn t matter what we do to her. She won t feel pain!»-Black yelled to the people and the wariors that just came. 

«I don t understand.»

«What s not to understand? Cause the slayer pain, get the hellmouth open.»

«But didn t you just say….?»

«I said a lie.»

Sound of a sharp violins voice cut right thru them. It was cooming…from somewhere…maybe from nextdoor.

Cassie runs off into her room. Puts on a pair of throusers that won t bother her while she slays. 

Grabbed a bag. 

Started puting weapons in it, some herbs and things that may be useful to her if she s going to do a spell. She closes it and puts it on her back. A couple of stakes along with holy water goes in her pockets. A little spring-off knife too. 

And a big sword cames flashening in her hand. 

She was ready. She hoped. 

They made him mortal. Human. And they made fun of it. 

Then they tried to kill him. It was supossed to be easy. «But dey don t know Lumiere LeBeau like dey thought.»

He escaped. 

Somehow he managed to keep the aperance of his flaming red eyes and he also kept the power of chargin objects with energy.

«Dis gonna be a wild ride for Lumie. He not gon let this off so easy.»

Spike entered the room. 

She turns to face him.

«Cassie, sweetie, duck…you got the wrong picture.»

«O I got the egzact picture. You filthy traitor!»

«No!»

«Then what are you? You tell me! What are you then?»

He had nogthing to say.

«Nogthing is as it bloody seems.»

«What?»

«Nogthing is as it seems. She shouldn t get bloody dead. They promised me.»

«And you trusted them?»

«Yes…..we can go bout it together duck. You can t go there alone.»

«Quite the contrare Spike. 

I can and I will go bout it alone.

Caus I m a slayer….»

«For barely a friggin month!»

«…and that s what we slayers do. We kill the badies, the demons…but most of all:

we kill the vampires. 

And you my dear Spke are a vampire.»

She cuts his head off with the sword. 

Nogthing but ashes remains. 

This was for Red. 

Spike gave her her first fighting lessons. He taught her how to stay alive. Too bad that he didn t taught himself the same thing.

«I shouldn t have trusted him from day one.»

«Learn to trust no one.»

His own bloody words. Escalate to be eateen by the monster of nogthingless. 

As she turned around to go a book falls down from the shelve. One of Red s. She kept them all over the house. 

Cassie felt bad for not being able to burry her, just to leave her in that cold room, in that cold bed alone. 

«We have the power over her. And she will come, as she s been told.»

She picks up the book. All in a language that probably doesn t egsist anymore.

She should find some translation of it or something in the Magic box, she thought while she put the book in the bag. 

She went out and walked the streets that are gonna get dark soon. Alone.

Till the thought of it didn t make her stop, it almost got her hit by a car. 

«What if I go away somewhere far, far away. Where i won t need feelings, where paople won t be dying, where I won t be the slayer and won t be in charge of their life or death. 

It wouldn t be on my shoulders. 

Why shouldn t I just go?

Caus…let s not kid ourself, I wanna go. I so desperatly wanna go away. Leave all this shit behind. Way behind.»

It was an apealing thought. Right till Cassie remembered last night, the way she madly enjoyed the slaying. 

It wasn t normal, but it felt so natural. So beautiful.

«I can t go. I m the slayer. I m the hero. And i m all alone on this one. All I have are weapons, a book and me.»

«You still have us.»

«And yes…I still have you. Thank you.»

«We are the first. We are the last.

I am the first. I am the last.»

She can t quit. Not now. It wasn t about her, about what was it like for her. 

It was about the power that she had.

About the world that she had to save. 

It was about moral, about a promise given and a promise kept. 

It was about keeping her guard while entering the now ruined Magic box and to anticipate the atack that came from behind. 


	12. Forgiven but not forgoten end game human...

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: BtVS-Joss&co

                   Lumiere (based on Gambit of the X-men)-Marvel

Distribution: ask.

The things we leave behind

Chapter tvelwe-Forgiven but not forgoten-end game-humanity

By Slaya

«Who s gonna take care of us?»

                      Buffy

«Love is pain, and the slayer forges strenght from pain.

Love….give…forgive. risk the pain.

It s your nature.»

                     The First Slayer

After atleast an hour of studying books and stuff in the Magic box, Cassie was in deep despair. She didn t know anything about everything. 

And for two times already she had to hid, to avoid demons or vampires.

They were going at her cause of the prize. Who knows what the prize is?

Cassie. A vampire slayer. The chosen one. And what is she doing? 

Hiding from vamps. The creatures that she s supossed to kill and not hide from them.

She went on patrols alone, but this is different. 

She doesn t have a home to come back to. No people to wait up for her. Or just to cover her back. She s alone now.

And it feels just as it sounds. Dreadful. Alone. Darkened. Foggy vision. The end of the strenght. The end of the courage. All gone now. Cut in little tiny pieces. No one to put her back to what she once was. Can t go back.

«It would be great if Spike could get here now and help me out.

Call me pet or duck. And it would all be right, just fine.

But it can t be. I, Cassie the vampire slayer have just slayed the only vampire in the whole world who appeared to be my friend as I hide from the rest of them. 

How could I not see it cooming? How could I not sence it? How come Red couldn t?

She s dead. Laying in the cold room on a cold bed. A cold body of a passed witch.»

This here is end game. End.

As she layed down on the floor the voices came again.

«Don t be so hard on yourself. You killed the one I couldn t. That alone makes you a better slayer than I ever was.»

«You mean slayed.»

«No. I mean killed. Caus that is what you are. A killer. Face it. Stand proud with it.»

«A slayer is not a killer!»-Buffy walks in with her ever so relentless utopic idea. 

«Yes she is.»

«No she isn t!»

«If you would have thought about yourself like a killer…then…..you would have survived.»

«It was meant to happen. I was supossed to die.»

«No. You were supossed to live  a long and happy life. 

But you didn t focus on the present moment. And that is why you weren t as quick as you should be. And that is why the blood has been spilled. 

And that is why you had to sacrifice.»

After a long moment of silence Xin turns to Cassie.

«You are a killer as I said.

There isn t much of a difference in killing a vampire then killing a human. It s a very thin line to cross. A very thin line to keep.

Listen to me, and listen to these words well.

Listen for what we have said to you all this time. The greater truth you shall never find.»

She morphs into the first slayer. 

«Love is pain, and the slayer forges strenght out of pain.

Love…give…forgive.

I am the first, I am the last. 

You are the darkest one. You re not afraid to dig deep into it. But strong enough to never cross the forbiden line.»

«Face it C. You re born a killer. Just like me. But you re also born more than me.

Stronger than me.»

«Who s gonna take care of us?»

«I will. If you let me.»-Faith morphs into Spike. Someone who Cassie could never expect. It wasn t really him. He was a vampire. And he went somewhere down, deep down because of that. 

This was just an image, a mear ilusion. «But hell with it….it just felt so good. To hug him like he s gonna be here, like I haven t staked him. Like he s still here to jump into the fight at any time. I haven t even asked him why did he do it. That s what i would like to know. Why.»

She cried a little. Then she started painting her arms. Red taught her that. 

For good luck and protection. 

Some man aproaches. It wasn t a demon, not even a vampire. 

It was Lumie. But…he s a demon, not a human. 

But…yes…that was the change. 

«You re a clock now.»

«De wat?»

«A clock. You tick.»-she shows her finger in the direction of his heart. 

«Yea, yea….so I tick now.

Tick, tick, tick.

Tick, tick, tick.

Tick…..tick….TICK.»

He takes one of those old-fashioned watches on golden strings out of his pocekt. 

«Just a watch…..»

«Just de tick, tick, tick……you better get out of town cherie.»

«I have a all-hell-brake-loose situation to stop.»

«You won t make it. You re powerfull…..but dere is more to stopin a hellmouth open dan power.»

«If I hit you, you ll bleed.»

«Yea, yea. You hit me an I cry the red tears petit. Den you triger pain foe Lumie. Get out of here. Lumie will take care of de hellmout.»

Cassie abruptivly stands up. 

«Hit me.»

«De wat?»

«I said HIT ME.»

«No way cherie. Yu mad or sometin?»

«Come on. Triger me of.»

«Oh…Lumie  realise wat you trying to do. An it cut no slack. No.»

«If you won t, I ll just go out and find somebody who will.»

«But you re injured cherie.»

«It doesn t matter.»

«If Lumie hits you, it s gonna hurt real bad.»

«I m a slayer, I can handle it.»

«I don like hittin things no more. I m a new man right now. Not de demon anymore cherie.»

«Cassie, my name is Cassie.»

«Could dat be short for Casandra?»

«Yeah, it could be. It is.»

She picks her bag up and goes to the door.

«Don go petit. Casanda….sorry, de cajun accent s gettin the best of me Casandra.»

«I godda go. I m just like a clock. And I, as you,  tick and tick and tick. Until something trigers me off. And then…my alarm starts screaming.

This what I m doing…it s for the best. Of the world.»

«Moje su oèi tužne: suze se u njima bude.

Da ih prolijem?….

Ah, otiæi u nepoznatu krajinu, zaspati na brijegu zelenom,

Sam i radostan.

I snivati o zvijezdama koje ona nosi u kosama neveselim.

Sanjati o njenome srcu…

Koje izgara kao zaboravljena svjetiljka na vjetru, 

U jesen žutu, i toplu…..U veselu jesen.

                   Dragutin  T.


	13. Never looking back

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: Joss & co, Marvel comics……etc….

Distribution: ask!

The things we leave behind

Chapter thirteen-Never looking back

By Slaya

«But you treat me like a man.»

                           Spike

«You wanna feel a conection?

I see…I want…I take.

I forget.»

                Faith

«Your life has been ruined. You can t sleep. Instead you wander the streets, making others pay.»

     Holtz to Justine

                Ats

«You can t just go bargin in there and expect a fair fight between them and you. It s gonna be hell on earth and more than literary.»

A young girl walked beside Cassie.

«Are you listening to me?! 

You can t do that, you can t! It s not the right time yet, I m not ready yet, this will change everything. I m too young!»

«So was I too. So…..you re just gonna have to manage to dance on my grave. As you said.»

«I was telling the truth. I actually did that.»

«And how did you feel afterwards?»

«Better. Well….better than you by any chance.»

«You fucking bitch!»-Cassie smacks her. She didn t even bleed.

«Ha ha ha ha ha….

You think that you can hurt me? You re nogthing. From the time that I come from you ll just be the fool who dusted the only one who could help her right now, painted arows on her hands because of superstition, refused to question the now turned human demon about what s going on with Black and what they re expecting, you ll be the fool that let Willow, yeah, that was her name, Willow Rosenberg die, you ll be the one who will be a discrace to all!»

Cassie tried to ignore the girl. Walked straight forward away from her, never looked back.

«Question isn t how d I win. The question is…why d they lose?

Always ask the right questions slayer, always.»

Spikes harsh voice ran trough Cassies body when she turned to see him. 

Before she could say anything….

«You re forgiven pet. we all know bloody well that I m a bad man. Sorry again luv.

Every day you wake up, it s the same bloody question that haunts you:

Is today the day I die?

Quite simple pet. 

And all any of us really need is….one….good…day.

Make sure that the good day is your good day. Not theirs.»

«Those were the lessons that I had with him. He s right. Better listen up Cassie.»

«I will.»-she whispered.

«The point is: we all have a day to die…»

«We re all like clocks that tick and spring when we mangle with something and hurt artificialy and a slayer is just a killer who is trigered at some point and she has no other choice than to fight.»

«No luv.»

«Don t tell her. She ll understand alone when the time comes. I did.»

«And look what happen to you luv. You re dead.»

«She s not dead.»

«How can you say that when she is?»

«Well she s here.»

«So are you.»  
»What was that suposed to mean?!»

«No Buffy…don t get upset.»

«You ll stop doing that this very second.»

«What did I bleeding do?»

«You don t say stupid things like that! Jesus! I should have kicked your ass more often.»

«I have to go.»

«Hit em from behind.»

«And take that new cute friend of yours.»

«You don t mean Lumie?»

«Yes I mean him.»

«Why?»

«Listen to her. He s a great help. If for nothing else…..»

There was a double meaning in here. Cassie couldn t read it apart. 

«So…will you take him?»

«I ll think about it.»

«There s nogthing to think about.»

«How come?»

«Caus here he is.»-she points to a street nearby. Cassie could see Lumies shadow walking towards her. Buffy and Spiek were right. 

She needed help.

And since Black punished him, Lumie is a great choice. 

He surely has some venegance desires toward them.

«Wait up petit! Lumie s going on de ride. 

Can t let you go bout it alone, can I now?»

«What do you know?»

«Bout Black? De ritual?»

«Yes.»

«Black isn t de one that you re lookin for. Dere s somebody abov him. Someone big. 

I don t tink dat you should go cherie. Sometin in my gut tells me dat you re walking into a trap petit.»

«Sorry. I m going. What else can you tell me?»

«I can tell you dat I m goin too and dat you can leave Black to be, with me.»

«No way. I m the slayer, he s my responcobility.»

«Wat bout the one abov him? What bout him?»

«He too is my responcobility.»

«Casanda….you hav too much on your back. 

You re too young for dat.»

«I can handle it.»

Lumie said nogthing more, he just turned around and slamed into a tree.

Cassie laughed her head off.

«Guess tings ar different wen human not demon.

Forgot de sence of it all.»

«You were once human?»

«Yeah. And i met de slayer. She was such a sweet littl cherie. She made Lumie change his ways.»

«What was her name?»

«Marie-Cristine Du Lac.»

«I know her.»

«You can t.»

«Yes I can.»

«But de…»

«Don t ask.»

«Okay.»

«So….is this a severe punishment of some sort?»

«To dem it is. But no to me. Humanity, to be mortal…I choose dat to be my prize.

But in deir eyes…..it was the worst punishement.

It is.»

«How come? Didn t you want it?»

«Oui. But I tink dat dey added sometin a bit extra to the mix. I have de powers dat I ve had only as a demon but my sences are rusty….or maybe it s just normal. Don t know. You tell me cherie.»

«What? The pain? Or not being able to feel safe as before. 

Caus I can tell you this: 

If I was to lose everything that I ve acomplished, my powers….I couldn t be able to breathe knowing that I m so weak, especially when there are so many things stronger, bader, more evil…I couldn t handle myself.

I would die. I can tell you that. I would die.»

«Don t you tink dat dose words ar a little bit harsh cherie?»

«No. They re completley right.»

«Fine den. As you say.»

«Why are you helping me?»

«I m human now, I already said that.»

«Yeah, but being human doesn t mean that you have to team up with the slayer. 

You seeking revenge or something?»

«I wanted to be human for a long time petit. But dis….dis dat they ve done….dis is a insult. Dey thought dat Lumie won t be as strong as a human like a demon.

Dey wanted to kill me while I was weak. 

Dey tried. And dey failed. So….I m gonna fuck up watever dey have in deir hands.»

«Good point.»

«Dat s where it is.»

«Where what is?»

«Are you really serious? Bout dis?»

«About stopin this thing? Yeah.»

«Completley sure? Caus when you get to dem der is no coming back.»

«I m aweare of that.»

«Good. You better be.»

«Why do you ask? This is my job, my life…this is what I am.»

«Yea, yea…for de whole month, right?»

«So? It doesn t matter for how long have I been active as a slayer. It s about how good I am.»

«You sure you re good cherie? Lumie don tink so.»

«Well I think so.»-Cassie almost growls at him. He was starting to get on her nerves.  But still…help would be good. So she decided to keep him right here.

«In de deepest, darkest secrets of de caves, there lies a darkness. A darkness stronger den anything else on de earths, de heavens an all of de hells. 

It s ancient, older den anything. Nogthing. Everything. You can never know wat it is. 

It s a hunter. And it s hunting de prey.

And de prey is you cherie.»

«What are you talking about?»

«Consider dis like sometin dat could save your life.»

«Could?»

«It all depends on you cherie. Now we re gon find out how much of de good killer you truly are.»

The word rings in her ears as they were aproaching the cementary. 

Killer.

To kill.

Killer.

To kill.

To slay.

Slaying.

Killing.

Killing.

Slaying.

Killing.

Slaying.

Are those words really the same in meaning. Is the protective shell of a different sound the only thing that makes them apart? Is it?

«Why you came to hush all of de sudden Cassie, de big brave slayer?  De killer?»

It was like he knew that he struck a dangerous string. 

«You should be more careful. You should not trust demons, even if dey are human now. Dey are still demon in soul. I thought it would work out…but no. No.»

«What da hell?!?»

«I m just sayin. De vision tings. Dey lie. Not all. But de ones dat made you come here. You re not a real slayer. You re a patetic image of one.»

A bump noise makes Casandra close her eyes. And it all went dark from that point. 

«You ve taken my chair.

And the music hasn t stoped yet.»

                           Drusilla


	14. The box

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: bla…bla…bla…getin tired of writing them……..nogthing is mine. Okay?

NOTE: thanks to bunnywabbit567(:, China gurl, Maximus, Teddy and happyM for e-mailing me and telling me what they think about this. 

Guys…..you were a lot of help. Love you all.

J J  J  J !

J J J J !

The things we leave behind

Chapter fourteen-The box

By Slaya

It doesn t kill you. What it does is make you feel like you re in a noisy little dark room. Naked, and  ashamed. And there are things in the dark that need to hutrt you cause you re bad.»

                    Glory

L

Dreamy days

Painted fingernails

Bathes in blood

Can t see a thing

Of what it might bring

Careless, careless

Bewareless

Leaving into the dark

Shiny eyes

Big yellow hats

By Slaya

«So….what s in the box?»

                                     Buffy

Dark and bright. Everything is false. There is no open air. Big green medows. 

Mountain…o mountain!

«Where is my mountain?»-a voice asked from deep within-«Are those memories false? Are they real? 

I can not grasp the content that s making them feel.

Is this a game?

A game wich name I can not speak? Am I mortal….alive or dead?

Where does the pain end?

The forgiveness seaked so eager to deal with, but when we joined…the mascarade stoped.

The music drained the last bit of hearing that we had.

And it left everything emty, so sad.»

Cassie was confused and scared. Laying somwhere wet, in the dark. 

The voice she heard wasn t her own. Or so she thought.

But…it was true, not her own. It was from a «box» next door.

«I didn t know that things were so bad.

They left me behind.

And I didn t know how to talk anymore, it all came silent, it all came weary, all together feary.

Can not think, can not say.

Drained of it all, my eyes are dark, my fingers pale

All that s left is morning hail

Of the damned Sunnydale.»

It was the voice of the girl from school, Blair while Cassies sister Blair was who knows where. Along with her parents.

But that s not important now. 

What was important were the little animals that came inside and put their sharp fangs into Cassies hands. She tried not to make a sound, to be strong just liek a slayer should be. Until she could bare the pain no longerr and had to scream for relief.

Couple of darkened rooms ahead Lumie could recognise her scream among thousands of others. It wasn t a normal scream.

She was fighting. And enjoying the fight even if it looked like she wasn t gonna make it. 

«So…….»-the monster in the black suit started-«I guess we underminded you after all mister Lumiere.»

«Lumie say so too. And for dat….Lumie asks a reward.»

«But you already have your humanity.»

«That was good enough….den. Now I m pretty pissed and wan more. Get de point?»

«But you just did what you were suposed to do.»

«Yea, mais dat trying to kill me ting didn t help to our buisiness afair. I m looking for extra now.»

«Offcourse mister Lumiere. Whatever you want.

You know…..you are a human as you were a demon. Completley the same.»

«Yea. Lumie know dat. And dats why I m asking to be a demon again. But more, more, more an more powerful.»

«Understandable I asure you.»

«To kill

Is to breathe

For you are the one

That s been left standing alive»

«What da hell are you saying?»-Cassie said eghausted at the end of her strenght. Nogthing can be done for her now as the glowing sphere in the room grows biger and all the way more and more giant, like a noise of a ferious cat, ready to strike at any time.

«I m saying fight it.»

«To weak, to scared, to bothered. I m in a little room right now. There are things in the dark that mean me harm.»-she points to her hands-«It s end game now. It s almost as I already left behind.»

«Cat of heart

Save the vibrant dark

For it is a friend

You live and breathe it

So make your sorow go away

Away far away

Make no notice

The riddle is the way to go

And there is no such thing like a good day to die.»

«Who are you? You must be a new one.»

«I am the guide.»

«The guide to what?»

«The guide to the heavens and hells

Just here to say that the thing cooming is bad

To the bone of the heart that it doesn t posess

It makes strong remarks 

Of leaving you in the dark

Making the light go away

It never wants to say the truth.»

«Where am I?»

«In a little box. 

You listen to me, not.»

«O please…..stop with the master jedi Yoda thing. It s not that original.»

«But it is the truth. You listen to me not.

Because you are scared of the things that you have so easily left behind.

I must remind you.

You left everything, pushed it aside

But you gained love and strenght.

Don t let it go now. Don t let yourself to die just like any other mortal.

You are spacial.

And you know that.»

«You are a lie. A lie that they tell me to keep me alive until the time comes.»

«The time for what?»

«I don t know.»

«Neither do I.»

The voice dissapears. It left her. As she was left many times. By different people. Different things. She was the one left standing.

«The voice is right. Why am i left standing alone, behind?»


	15. The things behind

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com

disclaimer: Don t own nada. Am not making money on it. Don t have money.

Distribution: ASK and you shall receive.

NOTE: Thans to all who have e-mailed me so far. They have great ideas, great things up in that head of theirs. 

Most thanks to: bunnywabbit567(:, China gurl, Maximus, teddy and happyM.

But I don t want to forget anybody else so I ll name them all:

Opal Iris, Moonstruck, Maybeline Babeline, chartsrockerguy, mrs._maybe_some_other_time_pretty_lady_you, Crofting lad, Larissa, Laura, Rebecca, Remy, Willow s_fuzzy_sweather, Angelus, Izrioka, Cortez, CLD (Crazy Little Daisy), morning glory, W/R shipper, X-maniac, Snjesana, Blade, corpin_de_corpses, Ayeka, bothered, Buffy Summerz, Haley Comet, making_out-lots_of_gooo_time, freak, Alana,  Elaine and last but so not least Marvelous Marvel girl.

Love you all: J

(What a fableous merry company we make!)

The things we leave behind

Chapter fifteen-The things behind

By Slaya

«I left my family, I left my friends, I left my life, I left them all.

And for what?!?

To let all the world down and let somebody destroy it?

I don t think so. 

No.

Buffy told me to live and forget the non-sence about me dieing in five years or so.

I am a slayer, I am strong and I must live.

It has been told. It shall be done.

So now I will rip all of the monstreous chains surounding my weak being…and set myself free.

Caus I do not want to leave in vain the things I left behind.

It all comes to be so clear, so vivid. 

A dream that I might have had.

I am in the right place. And it s the right time.

I havbe left all behind.

Love, joy, memories, sweet things and midnight sleeps. I have left it all.

To die, to fight trying, to be a strong stone in front of them all.

This is my duty.

This is my destiny

This is my all.

This is me.

I am Cassie. The vampire slayer.»

A big bang was heard from the room where the slayer was held. 

Something in Lumie makes him hide the hope from his eyes. He musn t fail now. He has to play his part of the big bad demon till the end. 

Black didn t seem worried.

The doors were locked shut. 

And no thing alive or dead could penetrate the adamantium shield. 

But a demon could.

Lumie did.

As Cassie set everyione free still with bloody hands of hers. 

The glowing sphere stood stronger and wilder, empowered with anger. 

Cassie remembered a spell that Red has taught her. And she managed to do then something that she never thought that she will be able to do. 

She destroyed it. She used the witch in her and combined her with the slayer and added just the right amount….of herself.

Then she colapsed. Her work was done….for now.

Black was foolishly dead. He made Lumiere too strong.

It was all over in a heartbeat.

Then a demon picked up Cassies body and went off with her.

A demon whose body and face were not recognisable. He became the thing he never wanted to be. A monster. Inside and outside.

Damned to walk the streets only at night. Just like a stupid vamp. 

Caus he was now the boogie-man, a creature that children fright of with endless tears.

He left Cassie inside of her house. 

He removed Spike s ashes and Red s dead body. 

And left before the brake of dawn. 

With no return. 

The end


	16. EPILOGUE

e-mail: Slaya@rock.com 

disclaimer: Only the plot is mine. Also the characters of Cassie, her sister Blair, her friend Blair and Black.

EPILOGUE

A black haired girl jumps out of the dark. She fights. She kills. She wins. And she is alive for that.

All the way on the mountain behind the town of Sunnydale there is a cave. 

And in the cave there is a monster. He cries every night. But he knows he has done the right thing.

Some old little woman dreads from the sight on a young girl all alone in a dark aley. Her noisy little nose can t help but spy on her. Old bat hags are usually like that. Well….the times when they re not scared from the sounds coming from the near-by mountain. 

She saw the girl punching the wall that cracked. 

And a big man steped outside. 

She hit him with something and he turned straight to dust.

«Must be the work of the devil.»-she thought scared and hid in the room, closed the window.

Kids would sometimes go up to the cave to see the dreaded monster. 

Then he would scared them, maybe spill some blood, nogthing major, just to scare them a little bit. 

«De little monsters deserve it, oui?»-he talked to himself.

People were odly looking at the local trouble maker, the high school drop out Casandra Lewis. They talked about her tatooes on her hands. Little did they know….the tatooes were there to hide the scars of torn and braked skin.

 They didn t know that Lewis wasn t her real surname. 

It was Nogthinlore. Strange and ancient. 

After all she comes from a great line of brave slayers. 

India Cohen, Buffy Summers, Kendra, Buffy Summers again (don t ask), Faith (and still Buffy), then at last Casandra Nogthinlore. 

After her…there goes Austin.

But for now it s just casandra. And yes. She will live to see twenty one.

«Can t very well let it be

Caus there is no patience in me

I am a slayer

I am a killer

But above all

I am Casandra, Casanda as someone used to call me

Just a girl

A strong one indeed…. I must say»


End file.
